


Players One and Two Through Thick and Thin

by isTrash



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: A lot of hospitals, ANGGGGGGGGSSSSSSSTTTTTT, Angst, Angst depending on if i listen to MCR, Angst with a Happy Ending, Be More Chill - Freeform, Boyfriends, Eventual Happiness, Fire, JakeRich, Jer’s mom is a homophobe, Michael has 2 moms, Multi, Original Character(s), PT cruisers, Panic Attacks, Pining, Rich's lisp tho, STILL A LOT OF DAMN MOTHAEFFIN ANGST, Suicidal Thoughts, Swearing, The squip redeems himself then blows it, a LOT of damn angst, a whole lot of terrible puns, boyf riends — Freeform, dat teenage angst tho, dead depressing crap, male x male, mtn dew red, one little suicide attempt, underage drinking cuz that's cool (dont drink kids)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-01-08 01:04:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12244104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isTrash/pseuds/isTrash
Summary: What If Jeremy hadn't made it out with everyone else when Rich set a fire to Jake's house. Would it still be a two player game for Michael, or will it be a GAME OVER for Jeremy?(I'm not setting up an update schedule because as soon as I make one I wouldn’t be able to stick with it :/ )





	1. fire!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He just needed to save his player two. He needed to save his best friend. Most importantly, the love of his life. He needed to save Jeremiah Heere.

Michael…

That was all that went through Jeremy's mind as he ran through the house of his wild and drunk peers.

“Jeremī, Maikeru wa anata o dakishimete ita! Kare ga nakereba, anata wa itsumo anata ga itsumo nozonde ita mono o eru koto ga dekimasu! Ninki to Kurisutīnu!” The SQUIP was trying to tell him in his mind. In Japanese. It was a good thing Jeremy didn't know Japanese, he supposed.

But Jeremy fought against the SQUIP…and whatever the hell it was saying.

‘No,’ he thought, ‘I'm going to apologize to Michael,’ Jeremy told the SQUIP firmly. ‘If anything I was being the loser…’

“Jeremī, watashi no keisan kara, sore wa anata ga ima koko kara denakereba naranai koto wa, burukku kara no nori yori mo fukaketsudesu!“ The SQUIP attempted to talk to him again, but due to the alcohol Jeremy had drank, he couldn't get it through to Jeremy.

Jeremy sighed, and walked to the bathroom where he'd last left Michael. He knocked on the door.

No one answered.

He knocked a few more times, but to no avail. Jeremy took a deep breath. He opened the door, but was a bit taken aback; there was nobody occupying the room.

Jeremy bit his lip, and started to walk out the door, but only just noticed that he kinda had to go…

He pulled his pants down, and faced the toilet. Midway through him peeing, he started to hear muffled screams from downstairs, and noticed it got slightly more hot in the house. Jeremy furrowed his brows in worry and began to finish up his business.

Once he was done using the bathroom, the heat became more noticeable than before and Jeremy went over to the door. He placed his hand on the doorknob but instantly flinched away from the touch. It was scorching hot! He placed his hand on the door, and sucked in a breath. The door was warm on the other side. Jeremy had remembered those safety videos in middle school on what to do if you're in a fire.

Jeremy knew it wasn't probably the best route to take, but he tried anyway. He jammed his shoulder into the door. But it was locked. Jeremy didn't recall locking it though.

‘It must be jammed!’ Jeremy thought.  
“Shit…” Jeremy muttered to no one in particular, running his fingers through his hair in distress. “Shit!” he repeated, his panic more pronounced.

He could hear the SQUIP screaming at him in Japanese, but it honestly didn't register.

Jake's house was made of wood. Wood and fire definitely didn't mix well in the house department.

So when the thick smoke started to cloud the air, and Jeremy started breathing it in, he got a bit worried for his health. Jeremy saw the window next to the toilet, and started to head towards that but then, all of a sudden, a snapping sound echoed throughout the room.

Jeremy looked up.

A wooden support beam with flames grasping onto it, had started to fall.

Directly over Jeremy.

Jeremy didn't even register the beam hitting his head hard or the weight of the beam. However, what he was aware of, were the flames. Now that was the painful part.

He got enveloped in a pain, an agonizing pain. Jeremy screamed a scream of true torture, but started to cough violently as he inhaled the developing smoke.

After what seemed to feel like hours and hours of him coughing his lungs out, Jeremy's vision slipped in and out of focus, and black dots started to surround his sight. He could vaguely hear his name being called from a distant, but yet familiar and soothing voice. He just wanted to go to sleep though…

And Jeremy's last thoughts as he slipped away from unconsciousness made dread fill his stomach.

I hope Michael made it out.

 

* * *

 

Michael started to collect himself from the breakdown he'd just had from his best and only friend, calling him a loser. He was crying over Jeremy Heere. He opened the bathroom door to the biggest party of the fall. But he didn't go back out there to party. No, he exited the safe room he took refuge in to leave the house.

If he was honest though, his stomach was filled with an unknown dread. Michael had the feeling that something bad is happening. Michael just dismissed the feeling as an after effect of a panic attack.

As Michael exited the house, making his way to the sidewalk, he could hear screaming from behind him. He turned around, ready to see something that you only saw in high school, only to see Jake's house in flames.

Michael watched, petrified, as everyone started shoving each other to get out of the fires reach, flooding out of the house through the front door. One boy on the second floor holding something slammed himself into a window, breaking it, just to get out of the fire.

Michael could smell the odor of the flames, watching the embers fly away from the house, the thick smoke floating from the windows and mixing with the crisp October air. He could hear the sirens belonging to the ambulances and fire trucks.

Through, something was off to Michael. He took a step forward, feeling numb, and was searching desperately through the crowd of teenagers. He searched for any sign of his best friend of twelve years, the one he'd had a crush on since the seventh grade, the one who'd just called him a loser in the bathroom, and soon felt adrenaline flood into his bloodstream. He could find the panic attack he'd just recovered from find its way back to him. Sure, he didn't like how Jeremy was treating him, but he knew Jeremy. He wouldn't be acting this way unless he had a good reason to or was being forced. Michael went with the forced one, considering the SQUIP.

“Jeremy!”Michael cried out for his player one, but only gained sympathetic looks. Michael panicked and called out again; “Jeremy!”

Michael stared at everyone. They all looked like shit, which was to be expected after a house fire. They were covered in ashes and soot, and were coughing up the smoke that had entered their lungs. He could hear sobs and murmurs such as “I don't know if Heere made it” or “do you hear his friend calling out for him? Wouldn't be surprised if he'd burned to death.”

Christine walked up to Michael with a very sorrowful and somber expression. She hesitated and then looked Michael in the eyes.

“I-I don't think Jeremy made it out-”  
Whatever else Christine was saying, Michael couldn't make out. His breathing quickened. He had to get Jeremy.  
And in a sudden burst of adrenaline, Michael sped off to the remains of the once beautiful house and ran in through the door, emerging into the smoke. He could hear his classmates yell after him, claiming he was crazy.

But Michael Mell didn't care.

He just needed to save his player two. He needed to save his best friend. Most importantly, the love of his life.

He needed to save Jeremiah Heere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i know i still have all my chapters up, and they will be fixed shortly, but i just couldn't give up this fic! no matter how hard i tried, i didn't have the heart to do it! so, hopefully, all of these chapters will be edited to my liking soon!!


	2. saving jeremy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael goes into the fire too, y'know, like a dumbass. He's also comforted by the words of another queer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this is really angsty, I was listening to Helena by MCR.

Michael rushed through the ashes and soot of the remains of a once beautiful house. He heard the cracks of the embers as he inhaled smoke. As Michael strained his ears for a sign of anyone calling for help, he could hear brutal coughing and shrieks of pain. It seemed to be coming from the upstairs. Michael could bet anything that it was Jeremy.

Michael practically leapt to the broken remains of the stairs, yelling out for Jeremy. Michael listened to the howling wind adding oxygen to the flames, increasing them. Michael heard thunder faintly over the flames, signifying a storm heading it's way towards the house. He could hear Jeremy's hacking coughs in the background, as his yelping became more and more persistent.

“Jeremy!”

“JEREMY!”

“Jeremy it's okay! I'm coming to help you!”

Michael didn't get a response.

Michael rushed from the stairs, no longer with a cough to signal Jeremy's existence, and he entered the hallway. He let out a sob.

As Michael looked at all the entrances to the rooms, he realized that he couldn't tell where the coughing had been coming from.

And Michael knew that if he'd search all the upstairs rooms, Jeremy could've died before Michael would be able to save him.  
Right as Michael decided that he would check the room opposite of him, he heard static.

He spun around and gasped.

He saw a pixelated and glitchy looking Keanu Reeves in a business suit.

Michael gaped at him.

For some odd reason, he felt that the Keanu Reeves could help him with Jeremy.  
The pixelated Reeves spoke.

  
M̰̂̇ͥ͐I̦̓ͫc̣̼̬͑h̀̄A̠̬͗̿ͯ͛̆e̝̳̣ͪl̲̪̖̠̺͙̹ͩ̈́ ̞̮̲͕̾̀̆̽ͤͥ͑Mͩ̍̋͆̓́̚ȅ̞̞L̳̟͍l̘̽ͤ̐̑.̖̘̠̻̬̞ͧͅ ͎̘͑̏ͯ̓̈́̈J͓̙͈̭̪̟͗͆̅ͨ̃ͅȄr͖̾̈́́̌ͩ̊̚E̟̜͆m͈̩̱̟̦̞̬̆̿͊ͯ͛̂ͬy̠͎͂̄̋͒ͨ ̈͐H̻̠̫̘͙ͤ́͒ͮ͆ͦ̓e͕͈̗ͣͣE̗̣̗̝̱̠̙͊̀ͮ̇r̬͂͑͂̓͒̏̓e̱̥̣͖̪ͮ́̔ͫͦ̐̉'͍̀̽͛̊͒̚S̘̖̜͈̪͚͆ͩͮͭ '̜̩͎P̅ḷͩa̤̔Y͇̐̉͑e̲̦̬̍͋ͅR͉̟̘ͩ̇̋͐ͩ̆͑ ̝͕̦̯̫̍̃Ṭ͖̗̭ͤ̓̽̈́̆ͅw̘̏̑̋̓ͣO͙̥̟̒̍̿̐̈̊'̻͙̹͙̓ͯ.̀ͮ̃ͬ̈ ͈͔̫͓̱͚̈ͩ̐̂ͪ̽ͤỴ͒͋o̙̳̰̼͗͑ͮ̿U͐ͫ͛̊ͩ̊ͮ ͚̗̲̼̏ͩ͊̒ͧh͓̰̦ͭ̉̐̏Ä̫́V͕̤̞͔͇̭̂ͫ̊͒ͤêͫ ̪̝̹̞̤͓͚n̰͓̹͋̀̚O̬̺̺̼̠̩ͅ ̟̱̬͔̫́̑̆ͨͤI̘̭̻͇̜̥̹̋ͯ̈́͌d̈́ͣE̥̺͇̓a͍̩̠̹͇ͣ̐̑ͥͧ̑͂ ̭ͤh̭̰ŏͭͭW̰ h̝̼̝̜̳̠̜ͯ͗a̽Ȑ̊̅̆̊̆̚d͂ͧ̓̌̅̅̂ ͉i̞̲̚T̖͓̦̟͛ͩ̚ ̫̟̪͂i̬͍̔ͧͧ̏̉̆͊ͅS̹̈́̆͌ ̰̰͍͌̐͛ͫͭ̓T͙̞͈̰̜̙̮ͥ̎̒̂o̖͈̖ ̲͖̙̙̤̈̏ͭ̿͆ͥk͎̩É̜͇̙̳̍̀e̻͇̣ͅpͦͪ̊͂̓̽ͦ ̰̘̤̦̞̒̒ͤ͒͊ͦ̄j͌ͭͭ̊̾̆͋ḛ͕̫͇̤̞ͩ̔̌̃̈R͍͕̻ͦ́͐̾ͅe͖̗̘̼͐͒̊̔̃̈M̦̰̲Yͫ͐̈́̊͗ͭ ̭͓͓̤̣͔̅͛̿̏ͪḁ̭̉ͤ̓̊̉̔W̠͉̜̆a̜̩̜͕̱ͩ̋y͓̹̰̟͚͌͒͆̓̾ ̭̗̣̦͎̦͙͊fr͉̩̘̞̠̀ͦͦ̊ͫ̚Om̮̘̥̞͉̫̏ͯ̽ͥͅ y̥ͥ̂̃͗ͬͩö́͂͛ͭ̑ͩ͗U͉͇̬̩͕͒ͧ͋ͪ͌,̗͔ͬ̎͑͗ ̥͐a̐͌̍ͨ͆ͩND̪̠͖͕̘ͯͨ̎̔̈́ ͐ͮ̏ͭͯa̩ͥ̀ͧͫS͖͕̦̭̮̋̒̎̉ͤͅ ̯͚̼̳͙̯̊͊̈́͗͒ͅI̝̻̬̒̅̋̓̔ ͮͫͭ̍̆̿c̪͈͙͈͈ͬ̍A̲̥̺̖̮͈ͭn̠̝̮̤̣͔͛̽ͯ ̠͎͍̖̭͈̺ͯș̥̣͎̭͆̊͒͐̏̊e̲̹͇̣̱̖̤̊ͭ̂ͥ͋̂ͭE̩̝͂ͯ̓̑͌ ̥̙̤Y͉̳̤ͫ̇O͚̐͂̿̏ͬ̃͌u̯͔̳̾ͧ̏ ̮̱̦̥̥͉͖c̙͕̲̺̥̈́̍̄ͨͬͩÅ̎͐̓̿̑m̰̲̗̗ͥͭ͂ͦ͒ͬ̄eͪ̏̊̈̽ ̣͇̻̙̠ͯ͌i̫̠̤̫͒͌ͥ̉͂̍ͭN̖̮͇̩̓̇̓ͧ̌ṭ̹̅͆ͩ̈́̈ͣ̉ő̋̊ͬ̃ tͦ̚H̲̝͈̒͐e̦̥̤̋̐͆̈́ͥ̇ ̼̲͗ͯv͑ͬͦ̌e͑̓R̗͒y̖̭̜͖̪̫̝ͮ͆̊̊ F̊ͮͥ̐I̥̩͒ͬ̔̾̚r̲̹͎͙̲̳͕ͭͪ͛̓̾̑ė̓̀ͦ ̖͓̥̰̮̘̗͛ͬ̀̌̒̚J͉̹̰͙̱̣ͭ̉͛ͬͪe̯͕̟͚͖̤̒̂ͧ̃̓͌Ṙ̳̻̒̈̀͋͌̐ḛ̬̝͈̪̺m͍ͩ͌͛Y̥̱̲̗͇̟̪ͨͨ̂̓̈́ͦ ͎̚i͇̱̤̽ͥ͑̌ͬ̄͊S̻̆ͧ̋͒̓ͨͫ ̟̲͍͍̀̇i͍̺̤̭͔̺ͣͭͅN͔ͫ̐ͩ͆ n͂ͤͪ̌̐Ó̞ͫ̈̎ͯ͂ͅw̱̗͑̐̾̉ͥ̚.͈̉ͮͪ"͇͇̱̟͇̺̺ͬͦ

 

Michael instantly grew mad at the figure, now knowing who and what it was.

“You're Jeremy's SQUIP, huh? I guess you're the reason I haven't had my best friend!” he snarled.

The SQUIP actually seemed a bit guilty at the accusation, but it still kept its calm and cold vibe.

 

  
Y̪̜̩̐ͪ̒̂e̬͕̝ͧ͂ͪ̒͐̍͆S͓̟̖̳̬̝͈̮͒͊ͧ͗̄ͦ͐,̠̜̰͖͙̱ͫ̂̒̍ͨ ̫̺͎̀̒́ͪ͆̽̀̀͑Y̟̪͔̭̫̣̏ͨ͒o̫̯̮͙͉̳ͨ̎̽U̻̫̩̘̐̎̎ͨ̾̀ ̹̼̘̒ͩ̔ͩ̈̋ͫ̚c͈̹̥̺͈̅̄̓̍͋̆̊ͮͅȌ̺͚̥͚̽̾ͫ̿̃u̮͎̇ͬ̃ͩ̇̌̚l̠̫̓D̩̩͖͕̙ͥ͑̐̆͑͊ ̩̗̮͎̙͙ͦ̄̇̊̍͊S͚̘̾̽́ͦͯͪa͚̲̟̖͉̰ͮ̊Ỳ͎̜͒̋̓̊ͦͮ̿ ̯̹̗̥̦̭͓͙͈̂͋t̜̙̯͚̪̗̎ͦ̄ͫḤ̱̰̠͕̬̻̊̓̎͗̒ã̠̞̞̻̬ͮ̉͛̐̓t͚͉̥̟̟̫ͩͨ͊̅̃́ͯ̆ͅ.̻͕̹͎̠̥̓ͩ́̋̍͑ ͉̼̈ͬ̓̌̅ͪ̄́ͪB̹̹̖͇̿̆̃̈́̇U̜͖̪̖͔̩ͪ͊ť͈̫̘̫̻̭͗̈͊̓ͭ̽̔ ̬̙̺̭̪̪̝̳ͦ̈̈̋̎̔n͎͇͎̭͍ͮͤ̈ͨͬ̐ͨ͊O̪͉̗͙̼̜͊̃̐ t̟̘̞̊̂ͩͫ̆i̹̪̔͋m͈̰̻̬̌͌E̠̬̻̭̟ͥ̎ ̟̩̦̮̺̬̋͊ͥͤ̓̚t̼̼ͭ̑ͤ̌̍̌̔ͧ̀o̹͉̺͉̠̠ͩ̀̆̎̍͗ͤͅ ̠̩̥͖̔̌̓̑̑ͤ̈t̘̙͎͎̟̺̠ͯͫ͗͐̚a͇̞̱̲͙̭ͧ̀̓͒̎̏̈́L̤͙͖͈̰̊̌ͥ̋ͩ̆K̗̙̘̥̰̯̊ͩ̋̔ͬ͋ͦ͑̌ ̫̺̠͎̮̬͚̺͐̏̽͑ͭȯ̱̈́v̫͍͚͉̲͐͌ͩ̉ͭ̃̄̍ͦͅE͕̞̒̂̑̑̇̏̈͑̚r̮̝̮̜̹̄ͧͨ̀ ͕̥̞͍ͨͧͦt̥̬̊̂̆̈̾͗͗E̙̮͚̬̦͉ͯa͈͙̮̙̤̬ͧͦ͊̎́̿ͣ̐!̟̻̱̟ͤ̔͑ͩ̎̓̾̒ͤ ̭̰̞͕̗̒ͭG̝̠̼̯̟͌̋ͬ̔ͪ̾͑͗̽e͓͒ͯT͍͖̠̜̓ͬ̌̍͐ͦ͑ ͙̜̹͕͇͇͇̌ͦ̔͂̎̐ͅṯ̭̠̟̀ͤ͋͒o̺̪̫ͯ͐̿͋̽ͯ ť͉̺͔͚ͦ̌̑ͣͣH̜̬͕̞̳͉̟̻̣̏͒̊̌̽e̫̯̰̮̣̹ͬͮͭͪ̾̽̿͛̓ ̻͉̠͔̞͓ͪͯ̒̈ͬ̏ͧͭͅb̺͉͙̬̞̣͇̝̅̋̄ͥ͗ͅa̠̘̯̒̾̿͑̄ͣ͛t̞͎͇͓̟̱͇̜ͩͭ̄ͤͩ̚̚h͈̯̭͎͎̝ͧͭr̠̰ͨ̑̂ͬ̿̈́̾̇O̱̗ͯ͐̀ͦ̒o̥̜͈̹̬̩͆͆̂̽̚m̗̥͖͓̬̪̄̍̋!͖͉͇̝̣̦̲͑̆ͪͮ̓ͪ̇ͭ ̩͉͉͓̗̹͒J̼̙̻͖͎̙ͯ̏̃̆̍ͥ̒͗e̦̮̻͆͆̑ͫ̆̈Ŕ̞͎̘̗͚͓̤̹̅̓̔ͭͥ̽e͖̩̥͎̠͒̃̏̇͋̊ͧ̾m̥̱̙̎̆̇͂ͤͩY̮̒̆̋̓ͣ'̤̗̰͎̖ͧ́̿̉ͪ͑͐S̙̜͚̙̯̘̙ͣ͒ ̮͓̖͎̝̗̪͆̍i̳̜͚̜̩̤̤̣̇ͪ̓̅̒̏ͬͧn̟̤͎̖̦̅ T̼̒ͬh̼̳͕̘̝ͭͧ̄ͫͅE̲͗̀ͪ̎͌̃̐̈ṟ͉͚ͯ̈̔̑ͫͣẹ̤ͧ̄̃̊͗͑,̯̝͕͙̠̘̇̈̓̀̒ ̹̘̘͕̟̹̽̈́̋͒ͭͧ͆̊a̬͈͙̻͕͛͋̇ͮͅS͉͓̅̅͋ͥͮ̓̄͛͌ ̤̖̮̺̪͇ͣ͐ͣͯ͆͒ͮ̚h̝̘̝̭͙̖̤͛͊͐̊͆e̘̪͙̹͎̭̔ͯ̀̒̔̂ ͓̠̙̤̓̿ͦ͆ͣF̦̣̖̹̗̯͎̫̺̐̓̄̓o͕̩̖̱͚̭͍͓ͪͪ̔̎ͧͪ̇ù̱̗̼̘̬̖̟͔ͪ͗G̰̹̲̯̒ͨ̄̓ͣ̌h̻̘̼͇̘̲ͯ͂͛̃̿͋t̲ͤͣͣ͋͒ͨ ͉̘͕̝̙̉͋͊͐̅͑ͨͅä͔̮̭̣͔͕͍́͗͌ͯ̌G̬̙͙̫͓͊̉͋̓̐̚ḁ̠̥̬̩͉͓̗̋͐̈́ͯ̐I̝̦̹̔̋ͯn̤̥̊ͪS̥̭̰͍̩ͧ̉̈T̼̱͈͔͎̏̉ͤͭ ̖̻̙͙̖̺́ͫ̉̃ͣ͛̉m͔̒̌Ě̤̯̣̜͓̪͓̬̄͒̔ͬ͗ ̹̱̙̘̯̲̓̔ͅt̤̺́ͨͮ͌̃ͩ̔O̤̼̭̩̦̘ͭͪ̈́̍̋̉ a̭̫̥̟ͫͨͣ͌̾ͮͨ̓̀p̱̘͕̽̆Ȍ͙̠͉̪̺̖̌̌̄l͈͙̫̮̱̫̻̖ͩͦ̓ͭͬ̃ͧo̫̠̗̹̳ͭĠ̰̩̯̺̺̏͑͊ͫi͖̯͖̗̬ͬ͐ͧ̐̾S̟̹̖̱̥̗̳̾̌̊ͪ̽ẹ̗ͭ̃̓̔ͦ̽ ̠͖͕̞̮̍͐ͥ͋͆̇ͅT͉͕̹͇ͩ̎ͯ̉ͩͫO͈̪̹̖̘̣̰ͭ͗̆͗̄ͯͣ͆ ̥͇̖̮̖̔y̲͈͙̘̗̹̗̽͋o̲͖̞̗͖͚͉͉ͥͤ͌͆̆̂Ü̞̱̬̱̺͚̲ͭͥ̓̄͊̓ͣ.̭̘͕ͦ͌ͧͩͪ͒̚ ̤̪̫̣̥͇͎̰̌͛͐̑̊̋̎ͣN̺̻̭̓̎͊͑ͦȌ͚̹̝̳ͨ̽ͫ̌̌ẇ̜͙͆͂ͯͯͥͤ̄̌ ͙̜̓̐ͪ̾q̪̳͕̪̂ͧ͗U͔̯̠̘̞͉̗̎͆ͣ̇̽ͭi̫̟̬̲̺͙̯̪̞̓̓ͥͦ̂͌ͧ͑̓c̤̥̦͂̈́ͯk̘̯̦̝̼̠̊!̻͚̳͔̰̏̍̿̽͐̅̿ S̩̥̮̜̣̅̍ͫ̓͌̓̅̈̆ȃ͎̤̜̈́̽̉̎̂̓̽V̭̫͓̅̏e̬̝͓͖̽ͦ ̫̟̓̽͒ͯ̇͛ͩh̜͕͒ͅI͇͉͉͈̱͒̋̅͆̓̇ͬͯm͉̹̱̭͓̌͆ͨ!̬͒̀͑̏ͪ̆́ ̩̠̳͈̈͛H̻̣̗̮̦͕̠͋ͅe̝͉͚͚̻̖͑͌̑̔̄ ͙̘̤͚̞͔̫̲̂̾ͮͫͬ͋ͯW̙͚͚̓̂ͤͪ̿̅̓o̟͓͎ͨ̈́͂̓̅N̜̗͖̯̱ͣ͋ͮ̅̍̚'͓̪͉͇̱̬̅ͪ̚ͅT͚̮̣̋̈́̾͒ͬ̾̈́ ̯͚͓̫̱ͮ̋̌̓̇̎ͨl̫̟͙͎͍̙̘̑̈͒̾ͧ̉͂â̙̘̬̺̙͖̫̩͒̄̊̆̐̋s͚̠̰͆̈́̇̋͊T͔̱͕̙ͩͨ͐̎̅ ̜̟̹̯̠̣̰͌̌̃͆̇́m̩̳͇̰̺̤͔̞͇̄̃̇ͬ͂͂ͨ͐Ṷ̥̂̇̇̀ͮͧͮ̚C̲̣͕̞̥̼̽͋͊̐̊ͅh̖̯́ͦͩ̐ͦ̔ͬ̓ l̠͎̓̒Ó̱̠̫͉̖̣̹̤̂̒ͮ͛n̝̼͎̗͛̏͊ͅͅĜ̺̹͓̹̫͕̜ͨ̾͗ê̟̥ͤͧ̈́r̭̘͓̰̳ͯ̀̈ͅ!̥̘̱̦̹ͫͨ͊ ̦͎̙̱̠̼̫̟ͬ͋ͪ̾̄͂̍̍Ẳ̖̪ͅn̜̰ͤ̊ͧD̝̜̞͉̘̙͍̆ ̗̫̱̗ͮi̝͚̖͉͖̩͓ͫͭ̆̈̓̏'̺̦̱͙͙̘̦̱̯́̂͊ͥL͎ͣ͆̃̄̾͊l͙̬̙̮̈́ ̥̫̩̥̝̪ͪ̂̔̓ͦͮ̋͒̚c̙͉̟̖̃̊E̥̖͔͒͂̏̉́ͤá͕̭̙̙̋ͫ̊s̖̠̻̯̝͆ͧ̐͋̈̾̄ͧͯE̥̘͚͕̣̺̬ͮͣ̓̇̍̀ͯ ̞̭ͬ̓́̔̍̎͌̋ṱ̯͈͎̗̬̞̮̙̎̆̔̑O̰̗̣̳̽̾̇ͮ̈́ͣ̂̋ e̜̬̤̘̺̔̑̆ͣ̋ͥ̂X̘̲̺̫͍͖̻̳͐̿̃̔i̬ͭͬͧ͐̓S̜̞̬̥̰̲̺̭̈ͥ͌ͥ̀ͫ̈́͆̾T̲̥͎͉̜͓͎̒!̞̫̖̫̲̭̬̮̰͛̿͐̍̍̄ͪ̄́"͇̦̰͚̟͓̋̏ͅ

 

  
That definitely snapped Michael back into it. Michael gave a curt nod, sprinting over to the very bathroom he had a panic attack in. His hand instantly flew to open the doorknob, but it wouldn't work.

Michael cursed. The door must be locked from the inside!

The squip appeared again, but looking ever the more glitchy and fading slightly. Michael took this as a sign that Jeremy wasn't going to last much longer.

 

  
  
"̺͈̫̟̪̖͚̗̥̹̩̫̜̱̘̥̦͑̄̎͋ͦͨ́̕

Į̶͔͈̤̲̙̼͋ͪ̀̉̓ͪ̑̓̎͟͢t̨͍͕̭̞̙̙͔̤̦͕̗̩͚͕͔͙̍͋͐ͩͯ̈͌̊̿ͫͭͩ̃͌̎ͯ̚̚͘͡͝͡ͅ'̨̦͇̤͍̝̪̬̖̝̫̳̫̩ͨ͒́ͭͦ̀S̞̻͔͎̬̙͈͔̳̙̆̐͊̇̍ͪ̒̏ͧ̅ͩ̽̉̉̀ͭ́̃͟͞ ̳̖̪̯̱̙͈͚ͨ̈̐̓ͬ̽ͫ̔̑͋̈́ͤ̌͘n̵̨̪̩̪͉̫͚̯̗̪̼̘͍̬̺ͤ̾̿̀̑̑͗́́͢O̡ͮͤ̈͂̾ͨ̈͂҉̸̷̩͖͚̭͎̗͈͙̭͇̦͝ṫ͇͖̞̜͙̲̰̲͇͕̒́ͯ̔͐̂ͪͦͨͫͣ͊ͦ͑̐ͥ̿͆͠ ̢̱̮̼̹̰͎̻̠͛ͤ͋̎̾̀̒̈̅ͥ͘͞ͅḼ͉̹̜̪̣̞͍͎̣͐̑̋͂ͥ̀͘͘͟ͅǒ̀̾ͥͩ̈́͌͌̌҉҉̢̠͔̙̩̭̞̪̫̟̟̜C̸̶̸͕̪̟͓̮̹͚̰̰͈̗̳̭͒ͣ̿͆̀k̛̓ͨ̓̈́͆ͤ̈́͑͌̔̑̅ͯͫ̒̀͑ͭ͏̴̨̮̠̖̟̣̜̤̮̯͔̼͇̝͓̞̫ͅeͧ̿̐̅̆ͨ͘͏̧̭̖̖̣͖̘̫͈͉̻̣̲̺̞͠͞d̴̴̝̼̥͔̯͖̝̬̟͉͇̞̦̲͈̋͌ͦ̎ͭ̎̈̆̍̌͂ͮ͊ͯͅ,̨̨̨̦͉̼̘̄̎̎ͨ̔ͤ̔͋͐̄̄͟͠ ̧̤̘̭͔̲̞͖̪̃͑́̇͒͗̔̆͘ͅj̹̮͎͉̗͉̥̯́̇̐͒ͥͪ̔͆͑͌͂̅ͦ̀̀͞Ü̡ͨ͗̅͊̔̅̿̓̈̑̽̇̈̊̉ͦ̇͏̴͏̨̯̦͉̪̟̙̬̭̜͖̪̯͖̮̪s̈̏ͧ̿̇̐̒ͧ̚͜҉̴̤͚̰͕̟̰̺̪͚̯̞͖̦̝̟͎̩̀͢T J͒̌̆ͥͣ̽͛̐̈́͏̷͏̛̯͉̦̳̳͓̥a̸̶̹̱̟̝̮͔̱͛̀̽̓ͯͧ͐m͕͍̼̝̤̯͈̝͈̠̅͐̂ͦ̕͟͞͝ͅM̴̷̝͖̺̩̲̝̱̺̯͔̠̹̩̌͌͐̑͐̄ͭ͋̽̈͊ͪͥͥ̀ͣ̾̀̚͜͠e̵͎̩͍̺̪̱̹ͬ̓̆̀̚̚̕Ḑ̴͈͙̻̙̠̯̯̝͚̩̖͈͔͆ͧ̅͊͐ͨͬ̚͘͢!̷̻̦̤̩͔̔̍̾͆̒̏̾̓̽́̕͟͟"ͥ͋̅̈́ͨ͘͏̫̠͓̺̺̣̠̗̼͍͓͓̖͘̕

 

 

Michael had a fierce look of determination in his eyes. If looks could kill, the door would have been blasted into pieces. But, as they couldn't, Michael took one step backwards and with all the strength and weight he could muster, he thrust his shoulder into the door, snapping it almost off its hinges.

He did the same process again, ignoring his most likely bruising shoulder. He summoned all his strength and rammed himself into the door.

That burst the door completely off its hinges, and revealed the sight that was in front of him the whole time.

Flames were licking the walls and ceiling. There was a fallen support beam, fire rapidly burning it. There was blood splattered on the beam, as it had a boy underneath said beam. Michael sucked in a shaky breath, inhaling a large amount of smoke as he did so. The boy also happened to be wearing the exact same thing Jeremy had been wearing for his Halloween costume. The boy's honey blonde hair delicately parted to the left, covering the left side of his face like a waterfall. His hair was stained with blood, as a head wound was evident and a worrying amount of blood was pooled around his head. Flames were licking at his body, and it seemed that his body was littered with burns.

Michael knew who it was, but he just had to be sure. He dropped to his knees, softly brushing the boy's hair out of his face. Michael let out a choked sob, clutching the limp unconscious body to his chest gently. Whatever anger Michael had previously held towards Jeremy for calling him a loser completely vanished as Michael cried over him.

It was Jeremy's thin and pale face with freckles covering areas like his nose and cheeks, with ashes stuck to his eyelashes, and cinders coating his face. His baby blue eyes were closed, the ones that stared into Michael's soul with such compassion, it was seemingly impossible. His soft and delicate rosy pink lips were almost taunting Michael to kiss him.

Michael cupped Jeremy's face, softly leaning into Jeremy.

“You're gonna be okay, okay?” Michael whispered. “I'm gonna get us out of this mess,” Michael said, listening as Jeremy take a rattling breath and Michael looked to Jeremy's pale face… a paler face than normal and definitely way too pale to be healthy.

And then Michael did something that he had dreamt to do for so long, but never had enough courage to actually act on; Michael leaned down and kissed Jeremy's soft lips. It lasted for a few seconds until he pulled away, smiling sadly.

He stood up abruptly, looking for a way out of the dreaded room. The bathroom exit was a no go, as flames that hadn't been there before had started to surround the doorframe. Michael looked around frantically, spotting a window next to the toilet and bathtub. Michael grimaced. They were both unfortunately on the second floor. Michael opened the window, and peered down to the below. Yet, the fall didn't seem too far.

Michael sighed and turned back to where Jeremy laid, unconscious. Michael carefully yet quickly, pushed the beam off of Jeremy, careful to avoid the growing flames and any possible injuries that Michael couldn't see.

Once Michael had successfully pushed the beam off of Jeremy, he walked to Jeremy's side, scooping him off the floor bridal style. It was easy, as Jeremy was rather scrawny and thin, and fortunately, shorter than Michael, so he weighed almost nothing. Not that that was a good thing, though. Michael quickly walked over to the window, slowly positioning himself so that when he jumped out of the window, he wouldn't get hurt and neither would Jeremy. Well, hurt anymore than he already was.

 

  
Y͡o̘̍̉̍̈̅ͧU͖̳̚ ̤̹͇͂͊̄̓ͦͅs̽ͨ̇̏̓̈́Ḫ̈͐̾ȯ͏̣ͅÜ̖̱̦̭̣̺̞L̨͕̐̈d̓̎ͦͥͣ̑͜ ͊ͣ҉̖̱͓̘p̷͓ͅR͚̯͛͡ö̋͏̗͔̯̘̤̱̞b̰̦̲͈̝̺̃́͐̋̿͛Aͥ̆̐b̯̮̝̬̺͎͎͗̅̽ͬ̚̚l̜̼̫̦̱͉̟̄̏̓ͭ̎ͯY̺̙͓͚̌ ͍̪͆ͮ͌ͬ̈́͊̕B̡͈̦̦̘ͧ̊ͧe̴͇̹̜̙̎ͧ̈́̒N̘̙͚̦̤̈́ͨD̦͇̜͕̜͎̎̾̑̅͛ͦͧ ̧̮͓̟̱Y̡̟ͦ̆O̞̞̗̓ͯͥ́U̠̪̳̲ͮ̆̈́ͦr̛̲̤̻̗̜̩͖̊͒͊̌ͬ ̺̥̖͌͒̉ͧ̉ͨ͞l̢̗̄ͥ̅͑̂̑ͣE̝̹͚̙̪͑͐g̴̻̙͎ͫ̅̇S̤̮͍͖͙̰͓̃͌ o̸̲͈̣̫̓͐͂̄̚N̔҉ ̝͈͔̦̙̑ͦT̎͆H̘̘̎e̻̝̰̙͈̺̥͂͌̂̐̕ ̤͆ͦ͑ͭͤ́̍l̯̏̇̄̉̽͢A͔͍͍͈ṇ̼̦̗̫̯̞̅̈́͋͂Ḏ͋̉͒͒ͅI̵̻̰̺̭̞̜̔̈́̌͆̅ͪ͗N̢̐̂ͭ̔̇g̋.̖ͬ̐͋̄ͥ  


Michael spun his head around, seeing the SQUIP at his side. It looked incredibly glitchy and was barely visible. Michael's eyes slightly widened. He knew that wasn't good. If the SQUIP was disappearing, then that meant Jeremy was also on the verge of death.

Michael grunted in reply, swinging his legs out the window, hanging off the side. He took a deep breath of the cool and crisp air outside, squeezing his eyes shut. Then he jumped. It was only a five second fall, but it felt like years to Michael. Cold October air whipped against him and he found it rather crazy that he was feeling cold despite just being in a burning building.

Michael remembered to squat on the landing. He began to stand up, recovering from the fall. He winced when he put pressure on his ankle, realized when he realized it was only sprained.

He looked down to the motionless boy in his arms. Michael could feel rain descending from the heavens. He felt tears leaking out the corners of his eyes. Michael laid Jeremy down on the sidewalk, sighing. Immediately his eyes widened. Laying him down had shown how much blood was actually Jeremy's thin body and how fast, as there was already a crimson puddle forming. Michael felt a cry leave his lips. Despite Michael's previous month spent alone, deserted by Jeremy, he never ever wished any harm towards him. Even though their relationship was going through a rough patch, Michael still loved and cared for Jeremy.

Michael looked away, rubbing his temples. He suddenly felt the back of his neck tingle and felt a gaze on him. Michael looked to Jeremy's face and jumped. Jeremy's blue eyes were open and glazed over. He seemed to be having difficulty focusing. He finally focused on Michael, smiling weakly, not noticing or not caring about the blood spilling out onto his chin.

Michael recovered from the immense shock and he gathered Jeremy in his arms, stroking his hair. Michael didn't care that he was getting Jeremy's blood all over his fingers. Jeremy opened his mouth to speak, but instead, hacking coughs escaped him. Michael covered Jeremy's mouth for him, his other hand still ruffling Jeremy's hair. When he stopped coughing, Michael pulled his hand away and saw blood.

Jeremy opened his mouth to speak again and Michael leaned in.

“Y-… y-you… c-came…”

Michael was surprised by how weak and quiet Jeremy's voice was but he nodded and tried to smile reassuringly, but was sure it came out as a grimace. Jeremy laughed airily, rain dripping down his face.  
“I… s-sound… t-…that b-bad… h-huh?”

Michael chuckled sadly. “No, it's not that. It's just… you look like ass.”

Jeremy smiled and rolled his glazed eyes. “T...thanks f-friend...”

Michael smiled slightly.

Jeremy raised his hand and closed his eyes. He brought his hand up to Michael's cheek. He gripped Jeremy's hand to hid face. Michael felt tears rolling down his face, dripping onto Jeremy's angelic features. Michael watched as his tears mixed in with the rain.

“Th-t… thank… y… you…”

Michael nodded. “Help is on the way,” Michael assured. Jeremy hummed in reply and began coughing. Michael didn't care that Jeremy was coughing blood all on his sweatshirt.

“I… s-s-… s-sorry…”

Michael looked him straight into his azure blue eyes and he looked into Michael's. Blue eyes met brown for a second and then Michael kissed him gently on his freckled nose.

“It's okay. We're okay,” Michael soothed, “everything is going to be okay, okay?”

Jeremy just weakly nodded, and whimpered, burying himself in my arms.  
“It h-hurts…”

Michael nodded sadly, biting his lip.  
“I know, but we're going to help you and you'll be as good as new in no time.”

Jeremy nodded sluggishly, his teeth beginning to chatter. He started to shiver in Michael's arms. He closed his eyes again.

“I… I'm… s-so cold…”

Michael could sense Jeremy was losing consciousness and Michael knew Jeremy knew as well. They could both hear the paramedics running over to where Jeremy and Michael were, their feet echoing closer to them.

Jeremy looked Michael dead in the eyes again, his eyelids beginning to droop closed.

“I… love… you,” he whispered softly, barely audible.

As Jeremy said that, he took a shuddering breath, and he became limp in Michael's arms. Michael waited for Jeremy to inhale again but nothing happened.

The paramedics raced towards the two and started barking orders to each other. One pretty female paramedic gently scooped Jeremy out of my arms and quickly strapped him onto an ambulance gurney, while calling for a nasal cannula. Michael watched blankly as the paramedic deftly laced a nasal cannula under Jeremy's nose, taping down to keep it in place.

Michael hadn't realized it, due to him being overcome with the adrenaline of saving Jeremy at the time, that he was in a state of panic and the paramedics certainly weren't helping him calm down.

Once Jeremy was all strapped into the gurney, they quickly wheeled him over to the ambulance, with Michael sprinting closely behind them, but far enough to stay out of their way.

Two male paramedics counted to three, and then lifted the gurney Jeremy was occupying into the ambulance. The female paramedic started to climb on in after them, but Michael tugged at her sleeve. He could hear murmurs of whispered rumors emitting from his peers aimed towards him, no doubt about him and Jeremy, but Michael didn't care.

She turned around, and saw Michael looking longingly to Jeremy. She smiled sadly. “I'm assuming you want to see if he's okay?”

Michael bit his lip. “Yes ma'am…”

She chuckled and opened the door wider, signifying her acceptance of letting him on the ambulance. Michael eagerly climbed into the ambulance, sitting down on the bench right next to Jeremy's gurney. The female paramedic went to the front of the ambulance and told the driver to start driving.

Michael grasped Jeremy's blood covered hand as the paramedics checked his vitals. Suddenly there was an uneasy silence, with only Jeremy's shaky breathing to break the silence. The female paramedic took a step forward and sat next to Michael. The two other paramedics got back to Jeremy's needs.

The paramedic spoke. “Uh, kid, you're friend is um, well... his vitals aren't looking so good right now. In fact, well, it's critical. Just hang tight, 'kay? You're friend'll be okay.”

Michael froze. He'd seen enough Grey's Anatomy to know what that meant. He felt himself start to shake and could feel himself go pale. The lady laid a comforting hand on my shoulder.

“I know it's bad, but, he'll be okay…”

Michael gulped and nodded, gripping Jeremy's hand tighter. She sighed, and resumed helping Jeremy.

They connected Jeremy to an IV, but they had trouble. They explained how, ironically, he was too cold so they couldn't find a vein.

At one point, while one of the male paramedics was getting the saline for the IV, he knocked into Jeremy's right ankle and even in his unconscious form, he winced. Michael jumped to his feet defensively. The paramedic said his apologies and Michael sat down grumpily, taking Jeremy's hand again in his. Michael watched the slow rise and fall of his chest.

The female paramedic was checking Jeremy's right arm at one point and came across Jeremy's pacman tattoo. She laughed, looking to Michael.

“Did you know about this tattoo?” She asked, her voice still shaking with laughter.

Michael snorted. “I better know about. We got it together,” Michael said, showing her his matching pacman tattoo.

She awed, getting back to treating Jeremy's burns, smiling to herself.

“You two make the cutest couple.”

Michael froze. He looked at her nervously, already blushing furiously. She looked shocked at his givenresponse.

“What? Are you not dating?”

Michael chuckled nervously, bringing a hand to the back of his neck. “I wish… But sadly, he's straight as a ruler.”

She winced, almost as if I hit her with a blow of insults.  
  
“It was the same with my girlfriend.”  
  
“Really?”  
  
“Oh yeah. She dated a guy named Jack for a while, with me being her supportive best friend. Then they broke up and we both somehow found our selves together. Trust me kid, if this kid-”  
  
“Jeremy,” Michael corrected.  
  
“-Jeremy and you are meant to be together, everything'll work out in the end kid.” She smiled, her eyes twinkling with adoration.  
  
“What's your name?” Michael asked.  
  
“Emily, but I hate that name. So I go by Lee. Yours?”

“Michael. Michael Mell.”

She smiled warmly. “Well, Jeremy here is definitely going to be lucky to end up with a guy like you.”

Michael burst out into laughter at the unintentional pun she made.

“What?” She asked, confused.

“If anything, I'd be lucky to be Michael Heere.”

She still looked confused.

Michael smirked. “His last name is Heere, with two Es instead of one,” he explained.

She seemed to get it then. She chuckled, then she got up to the front of the ambulance to inform one of the male paramedics it was their turn to nurse Jeremy.

They wrapped Jeremy's head with guage, covering the head wound for now. They connected him to a heart monitor and rushed around, getting to work on his burns. The very few ones Michael saw made him want to throw up. Lee got out a walkie talkie and started telling someone Jeremy's stats. “…unconscious at the moment. Vitals are critical, lost a lot of blood…”

Michael moaned, as the ambulance jerked on a speed bump. He watched Jeremy and was honestly scared for his best friend's life. He was paler than before and the normally full of energy boy, whose eyes would light up at the mention of playing a video game or… Christine… but, this Jeremy just wasn't the real one. This one was lifeless and unmoving. Michael gripped Jeremy's hand, staring at his still body, almost daring him to move, for proof that he was alive other than the constant rise and fall of his chest. A tear was shed, not for the first time that night.

A male paramedic walked over to Michael and sat down on the bench.

“Does Jeremy have anyone who should be aware of his condition?”

Oh fuck. Holy shit. He'd forgotten all about Mr. Heere. What was he going to say? ‘Oh, sorry Mr. Heere for calling you at three AM and not coming over for months, but Jeremy almost burned to death and we're at the hospital!’. Yeah, no.

“Are you okay?”

The deep voice of the man beside him snapped him out of his thoughts.

“Oh, uh, yeah. I can call his dad.”

The paramedic nodded and walked over to work on cleaning Jeremy's wounds a bit before they reached the hospital.

Michael sighed, still clutching Jeremy's limp hand. He reached for his phone, grabbing his phone out of his poscket and went into his contacts. Jeremy's dad was on speed dial so Michael could access him easily in times like this. Michael took a deep breath and pressed the call button.

After a few rings, Mr. Heere answered the phone.

“Michael, why the hell are you calling me at three a.m? Oh, and do you know where Jeremy is?” The sleepy voice of Mr. Heere asked.

Michael sighed. His eyes found themselves on Jeremy's face, blood still leaking from the corner of his mouth and onto his chin, and his head bandage completely soaked with his blood by now. His heart throbbed painfully. He wouldn't be able to bare Mr. Heere's response. His wife had left him, and now his one and only son might not make it…

“Michael?”

Michael guessed he must've paused for too long, as worry was clear in Mr. Heere's voice.

“Hey… um, Mr. Heere… a-about J-Jeremy… I-uh…” Michael faltered. Michael was stuttering as bad as Jeremy did when he was really anxious.

“Michael? Michael, what's wrong? Did something happen? And why's there an obnoxious beeping in the background?”

Michael took a shaky breath.

“Jeremy he's… he's well um…” Tears began to well up in his eyes and Michael sniffed.

“Come on Michael. You can just let Jeremy talk on the phone if you'd like.”

“Well that's the thing… he can't.”

“Wait, why? Is he busy?”

“No. Because he's unconscious…”

“What?!”

Michael sighed. He began to launch into explanation. “There was a fire at a house party Jeremy and I went to. Jeremy didn't make it out…”

There was silence on the other side of the line.

A terrified and trembling voice finally spoke.

“I don't… is he… please, please, tell me that he's alive…”

“Yes, Mr. Heere, yes he's alive.”

There was a relieved sob.

“Is he okay? Where are you two?”

“Well... no, Jeremy's not in the best shape right now, but... we're in an ambulance on our way to the hospital. I think we're going to Beth Israel.”

“Holy shit… fuck… Okay, expect me in fifteen minutes.”

Michael suddenly remembered something. “Oh! Mr. Heere! Put on some pants, okay?”

There was chuckling.

“You drive a hard bargain, son… but for Jeremy… yeah…” And he hung up.

Michael looked up from his phone, swiftly pocketing it. The vehicle was coming to a stop and Michael was still clutching Jeremy's hand like a life line.

As the vehicle stopped, he noticed a few changes to Jeremy, like how there was an ankle splint on his right ankle. The breaths Jeremy took were rattling and shook his whole chest when he exhaled. The beeping of the heart monitor was annoying as fuck, but if it was in any way helping Jeremy, it was music to Michael's ears.

The paramedics started to wheel the gurney again, and they opened the back of the ambulance. They counted to three yet again and lifted the gurney up and out of the ambulance.

As Michael got out of the ambulance, he felt the cold air hit his face, rain splashing on his glasses. Michael sighed.

They all quickly walked into the hospital and Michael was met with the strong smell of disinfectant.

The paramedics unstrapped the straps to Jeremy's gurney and counted to three for the third time.

They lifted Jeremy off the small ambulance gurney and onto the larger hospital gurney.

They rushed over to a door and Michael sprinted by their sides, but Lee held a hand out to block him and looked him in the eyes.

“Hey, you can't go in there. That's the truama room. They're gonna check for any other issues we couldn't find or fix, 'kay Michael? Anyways, you just stay out here and wait. Jeremy's in good hands.”

Michael nodded hesitantly, with a few tears leaving his eyes. She smiled softly and pat him on the back a few times and then went into the so called 'truama room'. Michael sighed and sat down in the waiting room.

He had been holding back his emotions all night. But right then and there, he was alone. Even back in the house he hadn't been alone, because unconscious or not, Jeremy was still there. But now he was alone, and at that moment, he just didn't care.

All the events of tonight finally got to him, and Michael completely broke down. he cried and cried and cried. He cried because it finally occurred to him: he almost lost his best friend. No, not just his best friend, his world. The person he'd do anything for in a heartbeat. But most of all the person that he loved dearest.

Michael tried to compose himself. He sniffed, with only one thought going through his mind:

Jeremy, please more than survive.


	3. Major Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now it's just Michael in the hospital by himself. Michael reflects on those times when everything seemed simple. He thinks back to moments him and Jeremy shared. If only life was so easy now...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know why but i fucking love Jeremy's voice... er... Will Connolly's voice??? idk but i love both of their voices XD o and srry i havnt updated in literally like two weeks, i was just lazy

Michael's POV

It was nerve wracking, sitting there just waiting to hear if he was going to be okay. If he was going to make it.

I honestly hated hospitals. I hated the smell, the feel, hell, even the things! I hated hospitals in general. I guess I have ever since I saw my grandma die in one when I was thirteen. But now, oh look, another reason to hate hospitals: now my best friend was in one.

I heard passing conversations between nurses and doctors, all along the same lines as;

"... we don't know if they'll make it..."

Or,

"... they're doing much better..."

But if I was honest, I felt distant from reality. My mind kept drifting to outcomes mainly revolving around Jeremy dying. It wasn't a very nice thought. 

I groaned, trying to get myself away from those haunting thoughts. I positioned myself in my seat where I was arched on my knees with my elbows while looking to the entrance of the waiting room for Mr. Heere.

After about two minutes, my position was getting uncomfortable. I sighed and leaned back in my chair, closing my eyes. 

I really just wanted to wake up in my own bed, and have this whole night be a dream. Of course, I knew that the likelihood of that is probably least likely than Jeremy confessing an undying love to me. 

I suddenly realized how tired I was, and finally welcomed sleep to wash over me...

~ (kindergarten year)

We met in kindergarten.

I watched a boy from across the classroom from where I was in the beanbags. With me being small for my age, the seat naturally, swallowed me whole. I had a book out, The Giving Tree, but I wasn't reading it. Instead I was entranced with a young peer, who was a loner just like me, who was currently doodling who knows what on a sheet of blue construction paper during break time. 

The boy had curly dark-ish blonde hair, with very pale skin, and soft, tender periwinkle blue eyes. I smiled to myself, and went back to reading my book. 

I tried to read, I really did, but the boy, had stolen the spotlight of my thoughts. I really wanted to go over there and introduce myself, but of course, I didn't really have the guts for that. So I yet again, returned to my book.

But suddenly, I saw a shadow go over me and my book. I instantly knew that it definitely wasn't going to be a friendly encounter. I looked up, and saw Danny Anderson, the biggest bully in my class.

I gulped, and shut my book. I was used to this, so I wasn't too scared, but I definitely wasn't calm. But I usually got picked on because of how much of a Hermione Granger I was. I was a huge teacher's pet, not that I wanted to be. I normally half the time didn't raise my hand to answer something. And there was nothing odd about my appearance, the most irregular thing being the huge glasses that were perched on my nose.

"What's up nerd? Get out our spot before you infect it with your weird diseases." Danny sneered. I just bit my lip to keep back any comments to get me in even more trouble with the bully than how much I already was.

"Not so smart now, huh? Can't even form a sentence?" Danny smirked maliciously. Then, before I could even sense him doing what he's preparing to do, he crouched down and shoved me, taking the book out of my reach and pushing me off the bean bag.

Normally any other teacher would be concerned, but my teacher considered anything that doesn't draw blood or leave a bruise just horseplay. So she was a shitty teacher.

It wasn't that it hurt, well, actually it did hurt emotionally, but it didn't hurt me all too physically, it hurt my feelings. I started to cry, and the bully continued to taunt me, now about my glasses, and suddenly heard footsteps work their way over to me and the bully. I hoped it was my teacher, though I doubted it.

But I looked up through my sobs, and saw the same boy I get butterflies in my stomach everyday from looking at in front of me, facing Danny. I stared up at him in astonishment. He swung back his leg and kicked the bully in the shin HARD. I guess the beanpole could kick.

Danny fell to the ground, clutching his leg, as his face became red and tears fell down his face. Danny got to his feet, still grabbing his leg, and ran away sobbing. I hardly noticed though. Right now I was staring at my savior.

The boy suddenly turned around and bent down, and his beautiful azure blue eyes stared deep into my soul, trapping me in a trance, mesmerized by his beauty. I could count each of the honey colored freckles on his pale face. His delicate rosy lips mocking me. Concern was evident in his expression. 

"Are you oka-" he started to say, but I threw myself at him and wrapped my arms around his small frame. 

He didn't do anything at first, which I took as a bad sign, and started to draw away, but he pat my back, and I smiled into his chest, since I was MUCH smaller than him, taking in his scent. He smelled like the beach, and I felt myself blush into his Star Wars shirt.

"Jeremy Heere!" 

We broke apart, and saw the teacher towering over us with a furious facial expression. She was glaring at Jeremy, who was fidgeting under her withering gaze. 

She started shouting at Jeremy, but all I could think about was that I'd finally gotten a friend.

~ (fourth grade year)

Me and Jeremy were out on the playground eating our lunch since it was a Friday, underneath the huge oak tree that we both dubbed as 'Mt. Treemor'. 

"... y'know, I think the old Apocalypse of The Damned was honestly better than this recent one..." Jeremy was saying as he took a bite from his cafeteria sandwich. He grimaced, and made a face, and I giggled. 

"And that's why I pack my own lunch," I said through my fit of giggles. He pouted, and I snorted, while playfully punching his arm. He rolled his eyes, and softly shoved me. 

I grinned, and he chuckled.

"So..." I said, kinda not wishing to bring up the topic I was about to bring up.

"So...?" He urged. I sighed, and looked up to look him in the eyes.

"So... how are your mom and dad...?" 

Jeremy sighed and hugged his knees to his chest and laid his head on his legs. He looked away from me, to look at a caterpillar slowly making its way over to a leaf.

"I-... well... not... not good. They're um well, fighting a lot more than usual..." Jeremy started to tear up. My best friend instincts kicked in, and I side-hugged him and squeezed his shoulder in a soothing manner.

He looked up to me, but completely broke down, and sobbed into my chest, and I let him, even though he was getting his tears on my red hoodie that he'd given me for my 10th birthday. I rubbed my hand in circles along his back. 

After a while, I guess he was finished crying, because the sobs were reduced to sniffles.

He looked up to me and mumbled his thanks, wiping the underneath of his nose. I smiled softly. "It's what best friends are for. Besides, anything for my favowite pewson."

He chuckled. I made sure he was okay, and I excused myself to go to the washroom. He said okay, and that he'd be right there waiting for when I got back.

I went over to where all the grades teachers were, and asked my teacher, Mrs. Watts, if I could use the restroom. 

"Oh, uh yeah, just be quick."

I nodded, and headed over to the entrance of the playground, and walked out. I made my way to the outside bathroom that's attached to the school. 

I walked in, and quickly got done with my business. I washed my hands, and dried them off.

I went over to the door, and kicked it open. I walked back over to the playground, and back through the entrance. Whenever I went over to Mt. Treemor, what I saw, made me freeze in terror. 

Jeremy was getting held down by Fred Willis and Thomas Gratini, as Danny Anderson and Andrew Collins were beating Jeremy up. Jeremy already had a bloody nose and an already bruised face. 

I finally recovered from my shock, and panicked. 

"Mrs. Watts!" I yelled to my teacher over my shoulder. She saw me, and I pointed to where Jeremy was getting beaten up. She gasped and marched over there trailing behind me. 

Mrs. Watts forcefully shoved the boys away, while I grabbed a sobbing Jeremy and held him in my arms. His knees buckled, and we fell down to the ground together, clutching each other. Jeremy was sobbing into the crook of my neck. I was attempting to calm him but he was hysterical.

Mrs. Watts was fuming. She was dragging the boys from the collar of their shirts. She turned to me. "Take Heere to the nurse."

I nodded. I started to pull Jeremy to his feet, but he whimpered. I sighed, and placed my arm over his shoulder to support him.

The nurses office was the closest building to the playground, which was relieving. It took about roughly twenty minutes to get there.

On the way there, Jeremy said something that made me jerk to a stop.

"I'm such a burden..."

I stopped abruptly. I looked to him and he looked to me, confused.

"Dude, you saved my ass in kindergarten, and pretty much every other day since then. I have to help you sometimes," I said looking him straight in those baby blue eyes.

Jeremy fell quiet, and we walked the rest of the way to the nurses office in silence. Not an uncomfortable silence; just a silence.

We finally reached the room, and Nurse Kennedy made Jeremy go to the back room so she could clean him up.

When she was done, she came back out with Jeremy behind her, and went to Call Jeremy's dad so he could pick him up. Jeremy sat down in the chair next to mine.

And his baby blue eyes looked me in the eyes, his face set, and nodded. I smiled, looking him into his soul searching eyes, and nodded too.

It was a silence. A comfortable one at that.

~ (7th grade year)

"Ugh, I can't believe our schedule! The rest of our classes we don't have together!"

It was lunchtime on the first day of school, and Jeremy was complaining about our schedules, while I was stuffing a sandwich I had made specifically for him into his hand. I normally did that, mainly because Jeremy either always forgot his food, or some stupid bully took his lunch money. I wasn't really picked on much, mainly because I was a less noticeable student after kindergarten.

He noticed me shoving the sandwich into his hand, and he grabbed it and smiled. He was smiling a genuine warm smile and it was making my heart melt into a gay, rainbow, sparkly mess. He opened his mouth to speak.

"Thanks man... what would I do without you?" His eyes glistening with thankfulness.

I chuckled, feeling my checks go red with a blush. "You would go hungry, and be sandwichless. So praise the lord you're none of those, and let's eat." He laughed, and I took a big bite of my sandwich.

He watched me take a bite, and once I'd swallowed he spoke.

"What type of sandwich did you make today?"

I rolled my eyes and smirked. "I made peanut butter and dog piss, now hurry up and eat it."

He grinned a bit and took a bite. He nodded his head slowly, and swallowed. "Not too bad for peanut butter and dog pee."

We laughed together, but it was almost in slow motion... it was almost as if I was looking at Jeremy in a different light... I was observing all his features, but with a lust I normally don't have with him.

I listened to the sound of his beautiful laugh, looking intently into his beautiful face. His pale face, that looked like it was glowing, and his freckles looking like drops of honey on his face. 

His soft lips, that were a beautiful shade of rosy pink. And his perfectly white teeth, that were covered by his braces. The way that when he laughed his curls that were in his hair would bounce. The way his hair went over his eyes like a waterfall, and how his periwinkle blue eyes would stare intensely at anything through his hair. He made my heart skip a beat, and I stopped laughing, now knowing the reason I was seeing Jeremy in such beautiful ways.

I, Michael Mell, had a crush on my best friend, Jeremiah Heere. Not, not even a crush; I was head-over-heels in love with him. I just loved everything about him. Like how when he sneezed he would sneeze like a kitten, or how whenever somebody brought up the topic of a video game, his eyes would light up, and would instantly become infatuated with the discussion. How his voice was like music to my ears, and I couldn't go a day without it. I'd probably had a crush on Jeremy for a long time, probably just not even knowing it though.

The rest of lunch was hazy, as I spent the rest of the period dazed and staring at Jeremy. Inevitably, it was time for us to get up and throw away our lunch so we wouldn't be late to our class. We did just that and stood, facing each other.

"So, video games at my house after school?" He said, gripping his book needed for Biology class, (bless his soul), as needed.

I nodded, and sighed. "Our schedule sucks."

He nodded and grumbled an agreement. I sighed inwardly, my eyes no doubt filled with lust. 

Jeremy was saying something, but I didn't quite register; I was staring at his lips, and they were seemingly mocking mine, because I couldn't lean in and kiss him, because he probably didn't feel the same way. He knew I was gay, but he didn't know I was gay for HIM.

We finally split up once the bell rang, and I waved to him as I walked to my classroom, History. He smiled and waved back to me. It felt like my stomach was full of butterflies, as I smiled back to him and turned away. I sighed, heading over to my locker. 

Having a crush on my best friend, and my heart leaping whenever I even look at him, would be hard to conceal. Very hard. 

And that was exactly how my dick was at that moment.

Very hard.

~ (regular time)

I woke up to see Mr. Heere sitting in his chair staring at the wall in front of him. 

I cleared my throat, and he jumped, looking over to me. He smiled weakly, and we just kinda nonverbally shared our worry for Jeremy.

"How... how long has he been in there?" I asked.

"Well... the lady at the front desk sai-"

Right at that moment, Mr. Heere was cut off by the door to the truama room getting flung open, and a nurse was at the head of a gurney looked over to where we sat, and waved me and Mr. Heere over. We quickly got to our feet, and speed walked over there.

Jeremy was laid on the portable hospital stretcher in a hospital gown, and all his burns were revealed, and so was his pacman tattoo... but something was over it... like a bolt of lightning or something... I decided no to worry, it could be nothing too. My heart suddenly throbbed as I saw Mr. Heere throw himself at Jeremy's unconscious form, sobbing into his hand and cradling his face.

But the burns were the concerning part. They littered his body all over. There seemed to be a pretty bad one on his left shoulder, and his left forearm was bandaged up. His left leg was bandaged too. His right leg was in a cast though, I guess from the support beam falling on top of it. His neck had a bandage on there too, and that was pretty much it. It wasn't a very pretty sight to see Jeremy in.

They lead us to the ICU area, and into a room. 

The doctor wanted a word with Mr. Heere alone, so they went outside. With me in the room with Jeremy.

I sighed and strode over to his bedside. I sat in a chair. I ran a hand through my hair.

"Hey Jer...."


	4. Michael and the Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What are Mr. Heere and the doctor discussing outside the ICU room? How fast is the news about Jeremy going to spread? Is Jeremy even GOING to make it? These are all thoughts going through my head at the moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am trash and i havent updated. pls help me.  
> i lost my binder last night and i was super pissed. i ordered a new one on amazon and guess what happened literally five effin seconds later? I FOUND MY GODDAMN BINDER!! ughhh. there goes five dollars for nothing... oh well...

Michael's POV

What are Mr. Heere and the doctor discussing outside the ICU room? How fast is the news about Jeremy going to spread? Is Jeremy even _going_ to make it? These are all thoughts going through my head at the moment.

I closed my eyes, tugging at my hair a bit more. I sighed and pulled out my phone.

4:28 a.m. Sunday, November 1st, 2015

Great. At least it was a Sunday. I groaned, burrowing more into my hoodie. I took my glasses off, and held them as I rubbed my eyes, and slipped them back on. I opened my eyes, and they glued themselves on Jeremy's motionless body, that was hooked up to an IV and a heart monitor was currently tracking it's many beats.

At first glance, the burns didn't seem too bad in the house, but when they were wrapped up like they were, they were hella more noticeable. Especially with the bandages already having some blood bleeding through from the burns. His head bandage was already soaked, again. They also had him hooked up to a ventilator. I guess he's on life support.

I sighed, tears of frustration and sadness flooding into my brown eyes. He was my best friend! I want to know just as much about Jeremy's condition as Mr. Heere! I deserved to hear about it as well, because how long have we been friends? _Twelve years_!

I groaned, dropping my head in anger on the table by Jeremy's bed. I laid my forehead on the hickory table for a minute until I decided to rest my chin on the table. There was a window over it, and I saw the whole sky. It was lit up with lights from apartments and lights from just buildings in general. I smiled a bit, taking in the sight.

I was admiring the sight until suddenly I heard the heart monitor's many beeps started speeding up. I spun around frantically in my seat, and my heart throbbed at the sight.

Jeremy's eyebrows were scrunched up, and he was whimpering. His once peaceful and angelic face now clouded with his pain. In just two steps I walked over to his side, and gripped his hand that wasn't connected to the IV, and squeezed it reassuringly. I cradled his face with my other hand, leaning towards him.

I started whispering comforting words into his ear, and smiled satisfied once his monitor showed that his heart went back to beat at its normal pace, and his whimpering ceased. I ruffled his hair, and dragged my chair closer to his bedside. Still gripping his hand, I sat down and traced his bandages that started around mid-bicep, and led to his wrist.

I felt tears pricking my eyes, trailing down my cheeks, and with my bloody sleeve, I wiped my tears, only to have them replaced by a new set.

Suddenly the door closed, and Mr. Heere and the doctor came back in. Mr. Heere practically pounced over to Jeremy, and started sobbing. I immediately sprang to my feet, and walked over to the doctor.

"What's wrong with Jeremy?" I asked timidly.

The doctor rubbed his temples. "Many things. Be more specific."

I groaned. "Well what's got Mr. Heere acting the way he is now?"

The doctor looked away. "Well, Jeremy has lost a lot of blood, especially in the head region. We had a few close calls in the truama room, and we almost lost him. Right now, he's in a stabilized position, but we aren't sure of its lasting stability."

I let the words register in my head, but at the moment, everything seemed hard to comprehend. "W-... what do you mean?"

The doctor sighed looking back at me again. "We aren't sure if he'll make it through the night, and if he does, it's a miracle."

That definitely made something inside of me that hasn't already broken snap.

"Well can't he wake up?!" I practically yelled.

The doctor looked very solemn at that. "Well that's the thing... Jeremy is in a coma, and even if he does make it through the night, there's a chance he wouldn't even wake up..."

That was all I needed to hear. The rest of the words he said were almost bouncing off me as if I had a shield around me. I wasn't hearing anything he said and I felt numb. I heard a ringing in my ears and I stared blankly ahead of me, drifting off into my own world. The only thing I heard through the ringing in my ears was the words 'coma' and 'chance he wouldn't even wake up'...

I felt a hand place itself on my shoulder, snatching me away from my mind. I looked up to the hands owner. It was a red eyed Mr. Heere, who seemed worried.

"...Michael?"

I fully snapped out of it, and looked to the ground. I nodded, looking back up to Mr. Heere, my face, devoid of emotion.

"Oh good, thought I lost ya there for a sec... well, look, it's late, and I bet you're tired. How about you call or text one of your moms, and she can come here to pick you up?" He asked. "I can't drive you mainly because I don't have my car, because I guess Jeremy drove it to the party, and even if I did have it, I just need to stay here with Jer, just in case."

I nodded, not really caring, but reluctant to leave Jeremy. If he wasn't going to live, I wanted to be there for his final moments at least, just in case he were to wake up.

He nodded smiling weakly at me, and went back over to Jeremy. I watched how he cupped Jeremy's face in his hands, and how he was much more affectionate than usual, almost as if he were making up for all the years he'd ignored Jeremy because of fighting with his wife.

I sighed and scratched the back of my head, pulling my phone out of my pocket again.

4:48 a.m. Sunday, November 1st, 2015

I ran my fingers through my hair and went into notifications.

None, of course, because the only people that really texted me or did anything like that were Jeremy, drug dealers, and my moms.

I went into contacts and checked my last texts from everyone. My thumb subconsciously hovered under Jeremy's name, and I automatically tapped it, not thinking clearly.

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: hey so am I coming over to ur house later???

I smiled a bit at the memory. It was right after Jeremy had encountered Rich in the bathroom. He'd told me while we had been playing video games. It was the last time we texted each other before Jeremy got the SQUIP...

MikeyWay: ya if u want to

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: k cool

MikeyWay: so how was play rehearsal with christiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine??? ;)

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: sHuT uP!! >:(

MikeyWay: ??? im not even talking. were doing this over text

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: u get what i mean

MikeyWay: do i?

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: just whstrver

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: whareber*

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: whatever** dammit! stupid fingers!

MikeyWay: y u shaming ur fingers bro?

MikeyWay: whatd they ever do to u?

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: y r we even talking about my fingers???

MikeyWay: idk u started it

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: i did not!!

MikeyWay: look back in the conversation

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: o (-_-)

MikeyWay: ya idiot XD

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: im so dumb ;-;

MikeyWay: mhm but ur my dummie :3

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: lol thats gay but im such a harry potter fanatic lol. when i said dumb my autocorrect was like 'oh r u looking for Dumbledore?' lmfao

MikeyWay: yea ik. just last week u fangirled right in the middle of barnes and nobles cuz they had a harry potter clearance section

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: yea. i also begged u into buying me a butterbear frappuccino

MikeyWay: and was it worth it??

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere:......... yes. yes it was. I FELT LIKE HARRY EFFIN POTTER!!! :D

MikeyWay: XD u nerd

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: HEY!!! im geek. get it right ppl

MikeyWay: whatever lol the bells bout to ring

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: mk cya

MikeyWay: ttyl bye GEEK

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: THANK U!!:DDDD

I chuckled. He still was a Harry Potter 'geek', SQUIP or not. Apparently Harry Potter was 'cool' or whatever.

I exited out of the conversation before I could drown myself in nostalgia. I tapped one of my mom's contacts.

I quickly typed away.

MikeyWay: hey ma can u come & and pick me up

Ma: Yeah sure. But why are you out at 4 a.m.? I know Jeremy isn't talking to you so...?

MikeyWay: i went to a party and let's just say things got out of hand...

Ma: Oh god, Michael, what the hell happened?

MikeyWay: well... it was a popular kid party but i wasnt invited but i snuck in but Jeremy was invited cuz hes popular but we had a pretty big fight but he came back to apologize because hes not that big of an asshole i guess but i wasnt there cuz i had left but...

Ma: Go on.

MikeyWay: but something obviously happened and the house burned down

Ma: What?! Are you okay?!

MikeyWay: yea im fine but Jeremy didn't make it out with everyone else

Ma: WHAT?! Is he okay?! Has Jeremy's dad heard?!

MikeyWay: yea hes with me at the hospital rn

Ma: Wait you're in the hospital!

MikeyWay: hold on lemme get to it

Ma: Okay, sorry.

MikeyWay: okay so anyway Jer came to apologize but i wasnt there cuz id just left the house but then all of a sudden i heard screaming right as i was leaving and i saw the house catch on fire and everyone was saying that Jer hadn't made it out so... i kinda panicked...

Ma: Don't tell me you went in there..

MikeyWay: well i didnt say it u did. but anyway i saved him but he had a pretty bad head injury and pretty bad burns and i could tell he was already dying so i jumped out the window and he woke up from being unconscious and he told me a few words and we made up and he told me that he loved me and I literally almost sobbed cuz then he just stopped breathing so then the paramedics got him in the ambulance and i rode with him and then i had to wait outside the truama room and now were in the ICU bc Jer's in a coma and they dont know if he'll make it or not and im soo scared i just wanna cry were at Beth Israel.

Ma: Okay baby, just take deep breaths, me and your mom are coming to pick you up okay? We'll be there in ten.

MikeyWay: ok

Ma: I love you. And I'm so proud of you for saving Jeremy. You're a good friend especially considering how much of a dick he's been to you.

MikeyWay: i <3 u too

I took a shaky breath and almost broke down. I honestly felt broken. I felt so emotionally drained that I felt like I could've just cried and cried on the floor.

I went over to Jeremy, sat down, and just cuddled up with his legs. I took in his scent and smiled a little. Even through the strong smell of disinfectant, his scent was as crystal clear as the first day I ever had the privilege to smell it. His scent that always seemed to carry the ocean with him wherever he went.

I smiled, my eyes feeling heavy. It wouldn't hurt to close my eyes for just a second while I wait for Ma and Hope... I soon felt myself drifting off, taking in a long breath of Jeremy's peaceful and soothing ocean scent.

...

"—Michael! Michael..."

I shot up in my seat, unaware of my surroundings.

"Whasgoingon?!" I slurred, sleep deprived.

My Ma, Kendra, kneeled in front of me, hugging me. "Come on Mikey, let's get home. You're obviously tired."

I nodded. She led me to the door but I halted. "Wait!" I exclaimed.

My Ma looked at me with a confused look on her face and I just gave her a halfhearted smile.

"I have to say bye to Jer."

She smiled, and I wet over to where Jeremy lay.

I gripped his hand, and softly kissing him on the cheek. "I'll be back later, okay?" I whispered in his ear. I saw Mr. Heere see my actions and he kinda blushed but smiled, almost encouraging my crush on his son. I looked back to Jeremy, pretending not to see Mr. Heere, and chuckled.

The ghost of a smile went over his face and I beamed. I lifted hand to my face and mumbled into his hand. "Bye Jer. I love you." I squeezed it one more time, and I walked back over to my moms, and my Mom, Hope, wrapped an arm around my shoulder, and my Ma's hand went to my hand.

"I'll see you later. Take good care of Jeremy, okay?" I told Mr. Heere. He nodded and smiled.

Me and my moms walked out the door, and once the door was closed, I couldn't hold back. I started to sob, and I collapsed to the floor. My moms kneeled down next to me, and rubbed circles on my back. I sobbed into my moms, with them cooing soothing words of comfort.

I finally calmed down after about three minutes, and I was just sniffling by then. My moms decided that it was a good idea to get out of the hospital. They pulled my up, and dragged me away from the room that held Jeremy, and towards the exit of the hospital.

I zoned out, and finally came to a stop. We were in front of my Mom's minivan. They opened the door for me and I stepped into the car, sat down, and buckled my seatbelt. I waited for them to do the same, and then they started the car. We sat in silence for a few minutes, the only thing breaking it being the turn signal noise.

We got back home and I went straight up to my room. I opened the door, and plopped onto my bed. I sat in silence for a few minutes, just processing the day I'd just lived through. It seemed like it was impossible I could've just lived through all this but I did...

I sighed, and took out my phone.

5:00 a.m. Sunday, November 1st, 2015.

I looked at my notifications, and surprisingly, there were actually _a ton_. I looked at one and saw it was from Twitter.

It read:

DustyKroppPosts

_**Rich Goranski sets fire to Jake Dillinger's house at his house party, with Jake breaking both of his legs trying to escape the remains of his burning house, and landing Rich himself, and Jeremy Heere in the hospital.** _

I felt tears prick my eyes, and in no time I was sobbing into my pillow. I was sobbing for myself, sobbing for what this night caused, and sobbing for my everything embodied in one person, the very person I'd just saved that night.

I fell asleep crying that night, the only thing soothing me, was imagining to myself that the pillow I was currently cuddling with, was Jeremy.

My last conscious thought of that night was overruled by a much more pleasant thought.

When all of this is over, I swear to God, that I'll be the bestest friend he could ever have, even if I only stay his best friend forever, it's enough for me...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and yes, i fully support that Michael has two moms. i just think itd be adorable, lik Michas just like "ohmigod moms, i have a massive gay crush on Jeremy and I don't know what the heckles to do" (yea i just made up that word lol)
> 
> and yes i had jer's text label be my AO3 username cuz im trash and michas label is MikeyWay bc im emo so i made micha emo. but my headcanon is that jer made micha emo lol
> 
> but the whole harry potter part of the conversation actually happened to me lol my friend James being the Michael in the situation, and me being the Jeremy in the situation lol I JUST LOVE HARRY GOD DAMN POTTER
> 
> I made a drawing that goes along with this chapter and I posted it on my Instagram. My Instagram username is: jeremy_is_utter_trash_hi


	5. Night Horrors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael are going through the same pain, for the same reasons, and in the same way. *WARNING* includes visual descriptions of gruesome injuries, and throwing up. Jeremy's part is coming from what's going on inside his C O M A...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sad because mother natures an asshole and that means i have blood coming from a place that boys generally dont. mhm thats right! im on my period :(. even though im a boy who was born inside a girls body mother natures like "no. you were born a girl so youre going through girl things okay?"  
> right now my boyfriends just cuddled next to me in his bed and im writing this and yupp

Jeremy's POV 

Time felt odd.

I was... floating?

I felt like I was flying.

Then a weight was added to my chest, getting rid of that floating feeling. And it wasn't a comforting weight, it was as if someone or something was trying to break my ribs. Then, as if the pressure wasn't enough, it started feeling as if it were on fire.

My eyes suddenly shot upon, and I immediately saw the wooden ceiling above me. It was getting, in fact, getting devoured by flames.

My eyes widened. And I tried to move. I furrowed my brow in confusion. I tried moving my finger. It wouldn't even budge. 

I tried thinking up logical explanations. Maybe my nerves were shocked? I really don't know, I was never too good with whatever had anything to do with any sort of health literally at all.

I gave up, and just looked around from the position I was in, my eyes darting around the room.

I quickly gathered I was in a bathroom that was on fire. Pretty obvious. But I was trapped under a beam. Not a good place to be in a fire.

I started to panic a bit, and tried to call out for help. Apparently I couldn't move my mouth either. Tears of frustration welled up in my eyes, and one slipped down my face. 

I was going to die, alone in a bathroom. Perfect.

"You're nothing without me."

I would've jumped, but since I wasn't really capable of movement, I inwardly jumped. I heard a monotonous voice from behind me. Not a good sign.

Then, like that wasn't enough to scare the living shit out of me, the room all of a sudden turned to darkness. There weren't even flames to light up the room. 

It was complete darkness for a few moments. It was eerily silent. I still couldn't move. Bummer.

But after a minute a figure lurked out of the shadows. The light revealed a pixelated Keanu Reeves. My muscles seemed to seize up. The SQUIP was grinning maliciously, a torturous gleam in his eye.

"You're NOTHING without me."

The words echoed in my head as if I were in a cave. It's the SQUIP's voice, but he doesn't seem to be talking. It just stares, eyes boring into me. I wanted to run, to escape his field of vision, but I was pinned to the bathroom floor, and I can't even turn my eyes away from the SQUIP's gaze. 

"You're terrible. Horribly pathetic."

I realized the beam was finally off my body, but what I thought was pinned to, turned out to be the wall. I was being pinned to the wall, the SQUIP grabbing me by the throat. He wasn't choking me... I guess.

But I wanted to slump down, look down at my feet, or anything to avoid those empty black eyes, but whatever force that's keeping me in place wouldn't let me do that. My back is straight and I'm staring right back at the SQUIP. I wasn't in control, and I want to scream.

"You only have one redeeming factor in your life Jeremy Heere, and you don't deserve it."

I want to scream.

Cry.

Yell.

Do something to make it stop.

I know what's coming next and I don't want to hear a word of it. I would rather hear anything else in that moment than what the SQUIP is about to tell me.

"Sweet, innocent, and forgiving Michael. He stood by your side while you were busy pushing him into it. All alone. Completely ignored. Even tonight, after you called him a 'loser', he risked his own life, to save yours. If I were him, I would've let you die in the fire then stomp on your ashes. What an awful way to treat your quote-on-quote 'favorite person' Jeremy." The SQUIP sneered.

"You... you made me do that..."

Whatever spell is upon me seems to loosen its hold. I can't move, I can't turn my head away, but I can speak. Speak words I don't truly believe, but words nonetheless.

"You willingly chose to upgrade. I didn't make you do that. I persuaded you to take the upgrade, but I didn't make you," the SQUIP paused. "I also didn't make you call Michael a loser."

"Made me... Michael..." I whimper. Suddenly the SQUIP's grip around my neck disappears, and I slump as though my strings have been cut, I come crashing down to my knees feeling no pain. It's like the SQUIP vanished into thin air, and not three meters behind where the SQUIP just was, is Michael. 

"M-Michael..." I know my voice is pleading, but the expression on Michael's face doesn't seem as though he'd heard me.

"Michael," I repeat, my voice nothing more than a sob. "Michael I'm-" as if the word had been plucked off my tongue, it's gone. I try again but it's like I'm choking on it, Michael only watches me with a disgust unlike anything before, he does nothing but look down at where I'm groveling in front of him. 

"You can't fix this. You were the one who ruined things in the first place anyway. You left me. I was all alone. After everything we've been through, you throw me away like a broken toy. Now you can't even say you're sorry. That's something a two year old masters easily," he pauses, his face scrunching up in anger. "I hate you Heere."

Michael disappears too, and I'm left alone.

I can't tell if there are tears, but I know I'm crying. 

I know I feel like my world's splitting in two.

Michael hates me, and I can't even begin to fix it. I'm repeating Michael's name like a broken record, pleading with him to understand, to pick up on what I'm trying to say. 

The next voice that echoes inside my head isn't the SQUIP's.

"You left me."

I scream.

"I was all alone."

I sob until my throat is sore.

"After everything we've been through-"

I don't know what I'm saying anymore, I only know that I'm in pain.

My chest hurts. I'm not sure if I can breathe. Not sure if I deserve to.

"-and now you can't even say you're sorry."

Now the SQUIP's talking.

"Everything about you makes me wanna die."

Now my dad.

"You're such a shitty son."

Brooke.

"You broke my heart Jeremy."

Chloe.

"You can't even do something as simple as sleep with me."

Christine.

"Why would I like someone as pathetic as you."

Rich.

"You aren't even cool with the SQUIP, tallass."

Jake.

"Christine deserves so much better than you."

Michael.

"I hate you Heere."

Now I definitely know I'm crying with tears.

They all talk together.

"You're a monster Jeremy."

"You're scum Jeremy."

"You don't deserve to live Jeremy."

"End it.

"End it.

"End it."

I know I'm in the corner gasping for breath.

"End it!"

"End it!"

"End it!"

I know I'm sobbing into my hands. 

I know I'm pathetic.

I know I'm terrible.

I know I'm scum.

I know I'm a disappointment.

I know I'm a monster.

I know I should end it all. 

But I can't. 

And that's why I'm sobbing on the floor, face in my hands, gasping for breath. 

For mercy.

For forgiveness.

For love.

Someone places two fingers under my chin and lifts my head up.

It was Michael.

"How could anyone love such a fuck up like you?"

I know I'm screaming into the abyss.

I know that everything about me is terrible.

I know that everything about me makes people wanna die.

I know I'm a slob.

I know I'm unlovable.

But I don't know why.

"End it. End it. End it."

They're chanting in my head.

"End it! End it! End it!"

I take a shaky breath.

"END IT! END IT! END IT!"

I collapse on the floor.

"DIE! DIE! DIE!"

They're yelling at me from all around.

I know I'm everything bad in this world.

And I know I could end it.

Why?

Because I make people suicidal.

Because I'm a shitty son.

Because I'm a heart breaker.

Because I can't even do one thing right.

Because I'm pathetic and unloved.

Because I'm not even cool with the SQUIP.

Because Christine deserves better.

Because my best friend hates me.

And I really should end it.

I know that.

But I can't.

I can't, I can't, I can't.

And that's why I'm a failure.

I'm screaming on the bathroom floor like a broken wind up doll:

"I can't, I can't, I can't."

And it's the truth.

I really honestly can't.

...

Michael's POV

I wake up, and darkness surrounds me. 

I call out. My voice echoes.

Nothing answers.

'Perfect,' I think, 'not creepy at all...'

I walk around the darkness, and I soon find out that there's some type of barrier by almost breaking my glasses and nose from running into it. Good way to start this off.

"M-Michael..."

I hear a voice from behind me. I spin around and face the voice, but I wish I didn't.

I fell to my knees.

It was Jeremy. His face had really intense burns and gashes on it. He looked a bit like the zombies in Apocalypse of the Damned, that was how mutilated he looked. He had blood coming from his mouth. His hair was matted with blood. I was shocked, but that was only the face. I looked down, and a noticeable patch of blood was soaking through Jeremy's shirt. His eye lids were half closed, his eyes glazed over. Big fat tears were running down his face, and he was hung from puppet strings like a marionette. His puppeteer, towering above him, unseen.

I just stared, unmoving. My breathing was coming out in short and quick gasps.

"M...M-Mi...chael..." Jeremy's voice croaked again. His beautiful eyes were dull and bloodshot, not at all like his normal ones. "M... Michael... h- HELP!" He said the last word in a shriek. He looked like he was getting electrocuted. His arms were spasming at his sides, and his face muscles were twitching..

I tried running forward, but I ran into something. I didn't see anything, so I tried again, but again, ran into something.

Why couldn't I move? I started pounding on the barrier that had appeared out of nowhere, screaming for Jeremy.

I sob, realizing it's hopeless when my hands turn bloody, and Jeremy becomes limp. I just stare, tears in my eyes watching Jeremy.

Then Jeremy's puppeteer reveals themselves, and I gasp.

It was a pixelated Keanu Reeves, that I knew instantly was Jeremy's SQUIP. The SQUIP was grinning like a psychopath. I was just staring in horror. Then all of a sudden, the barrier I was leaning heavily on, completely and utterly disappeared, and I tumbled to the ground. I got to my feet quickly though, but the SQUIP picked me up by the hood of my hoodie. I sputtered in surprise, and he held me up to where he was holding Jeremy. Jeremy was hanging limp, unmoving as the SQUIP held him by the back of his shirt. He chuckled maliciously.

"Funny. You can't save him. You tried but trying just wasn't enough, was it Michael?" His eyes flashed with malice. "And I thought Jeremy was pathetic. But you can't even save your own best friend. Exactly, how many times has he kicked people who were tormenting you, only, in result, to get beaten up later? Too many times to count. By freshman year, he probably just hung out with you because he pitied you."

He observed me. I knew I was crying. He tsked. "And you can't even save his life."

All the breath in my lungs just completely failed me. "W-what?" I gasped out.

The SQUIP chuckled. "He's dead Michael."

My eyes widened. I didn't even register him letting go of me and Jeremy, all I cared about was getting to Jeremy.

As soon as my knees hit the ground, I got to my feet, and stumbled over to Jeremy.

And his tiny, broken, and tattered body was laid sprawled out on the floor. His face devoid of emotion. He looked peaceful. I sat on the ground and lifted his head into my lap.

I checked his pulse, and everything around me was quiet. 

He was dead. He's dead. There's no steady beating from his neck, he's gone. 

I'm silent for a moment, and then I just laughed. I laughed and laughed and laughed. I laughed until I sobbed. I cradled Jeremy's head in my lap, my face inches away from his own peaceful face, my tears dripping onto his face.

I took my glasses off, and cradled Jeremy's lifeless shell to my chest, sobbing his name, like that would bring him back to life. 

I softly laid him down on the floor, gently caressing his face noting how his body was already quickly losing its warmth, and I noticed his eyes were open. His breathtakingly beautiful clear sky blue eyes, that I loved the most about any other of his facial features, were open. Instead of wandering, darting from place to place, his eyes were still. 

They were glazed over. 

They were unseeing.

And he was truly dead.

I screamed a heart aching scream, and laid myself over his body sobbing.

I was now alone in this world.

Goodbye Jeremy.

-

I shot up in my bed, sputtering for breath. I was about to check my phone to see what time it was, but I suddenly felt bile rising up my throat.

I launched out of bed, and ran for my bathroom that was, luckily, connected to my room, and slammed the door open, and ran straight for the toilet that was in front of the door.

The bile instantly rose as soon as I reached the door, and I threw up instantly.

I was throwing up for awhile, but eventually, I was only dry heaving. When that stopped, I pressed my forehead to the toilet seat, relishing in its cold to the touch feel. 

I groaned, tasting the aftermath of me vomiting, and I wished I hadn't tasted it.

I grunted as I got to my feet, instantly feeling lightheaded at my sudden movement. I gripped the wall beside me, sighing as I caught my balance. Once I'd felt secure and unlikely to fall over, I went back to my room, and checked what time it was on my phone.

10:56 a.m. Sunday, November 1st, 2015

No notifications. Great. I sighed. I chucked my phone across the room and it landed on a pile of clothes I must've forgotten to put up. Great.

I stood up and stretched. I had slept in my glasses, (risky decision), and luckily I hadn't broken them, so that was good. 

I grimaced at what I was wearing though. I was still wearing my CREEPS sweatshirt, and it was coated in dry blood. I took it off, and decided that I'd take a shower. A shower fixes everything, right?

I stripped myself down of all my clothes, took my glasses off, and sighed. All the blood on my clothes, was the amount of blood Jeremy lost. No wonder it took so long for him to get out of the truama room.

I ran my hand through my hair and stepped into the shower. I turned on the hot water, and was welcomed with the wonderful feeling of warmth. 

It was about a 45 minute shower, and I barely realized the water had run cold as I was so submerged in my thoughts.

I quickly turned the water off, cursing. I dried myself off with a towell, and grabbed a pair of underwear and pants. I got my Legend of Zelda t-shirt and slipped it on, and wore my red hoodie over it. Iwas thinking about driving over to the hospital and see Jeremy. I was suddenly glad I asked my Mom if she could drive me to Jake's party. I didn’t bother to do my hair, and just put my glasses on. I put on my shoes and walked out of my room. Nobody seemed to be home, so my moms must be at work already. And my older brother’s in college so the house was empty. Lucky me.

I grabbed my keys to my PT Cruiser, and unlocked the front door, and head out. My PT Cruiser was parked out on the driveway, and I pressed the unlock button on my keys, and my car lights came to life. I opened the now unlocked door, and climbed in, closing the door behind me.

I started the engine, and started driving.

It was a drive in silence, which was unusual for me. I normally had Bob Marley on full blast in my car, but I drove in silence. 

I finally reached the hospital, which was a good twenty minutes away from my house. I quickly parked, and turned the car off. I got out of the car, locking it as I did so, and headed for the entrance of the hospital.

It was quiet in the lobby, with only an elderly couple in there. I shrugged, and walked up to the front desk. A female with shoulder length grey hair, and brown eyes was running it. I walked up, and she looked up. She smiled, but her eyes flickered to my pride patch, and her smile soon seemed a but forced. I was used to it. I snorted.

Homophobe alert.

"Hello sir... what can I do for you?" She said in a sickly sweet voice, that was so fake, it was faker than Donald Trump's tan.

"Which room is Jeremy Heere's?" I said curtly, not caring enough to be 'polite' back.

She scrunched up her nose, dropping her act. "What, is he your boyfriend. I saw your patch, you homo."

I groaned, already bored of her. "Just tell me where the goddamn room is!"

She rolled her eyes, and whispered underneath her breath what seemed to oddly sound like 'faggot'.

"Room 268, ICU." She said, not looking up.

I nodded, not bothering to thank her.

I made my way to the ICU, and finally found myself in the 60's. 

"262, 264, 266," I muttered, "268! Bingo!" And I opened the door, looking straight to Jeremy's bed, but gasped, because I just saw what I'd least expected to see today.

Mrs. Heere, Jeremy's mom.

She turned to me, obviously hearing the door open, and scowled when she saw who it was.

"What's this homo doing here?"

"Nice to see you too, Mrs. Heere."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the whole front desk lady thing actually happened to me and my boyfriend. We were visiting my boyfriend's sister who just gave birth yesterday. So my boyfriend was wearing his gay pride sweatshirt and I was wearing my trans-bi hoodie, and the front desk was like "eww gross, you're gay" and my bf was like "yes. yes i am" because he's proud of being gay but then she saw me and she was like "EWW OHMIGOD UR TRANS" and I literally started to cry, and then my boyfriend literally walked up to her and punched her. We got kicked out, but it was worth it.
> 
> Btw I have a boyf riends oneshot called 'You Look Perfect Tonight' and it's based off of Ed Sheeran's song Perfect.


	6. Mothers and Abuse and A Dad Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So why are you here?” I asked, annoyed of her behavior.
> 
> “He’s my son. I’m allowed to see my son in the hospital, right?” She responded, obviously angrily.
> 
> “Yeah sure, if you were a decent mother you’d be able to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hold on to your eyeliner, cuz this ones an angsty one. I’m still on my period so yayyy. Literally longest period of my life. Feelings that I hate and I literally want to off myself. SO THATS GOOD.

Michael’s POV

“So why are you here?” I asked, annoyed of her behavior.

“He’s my son. I’m allowed to see my child in the hospital, right?” She responded, obviously angry.

“Yeah sure, if you were a decent mother you’d be able to.” I wanted to scoff back, but decided against it.

She looked a lot like Jeremy. Same bright blue eyes, same pale skin and high cheekbones, same soft pink lips, but she had thick straight black hair, that was parted in the middle, that had gotten a lot grayer from the last time I’d had the displeasure to see her, and whilst Jeremy took after his father, and received dark brown hair, but was sun bleached to make it look a caramel blonde. The only other difference between her and Jeremy is that her eyes are normally dull, or un-genuine. Her soft looking lips were also seen normally in a tight line, completely straight.

I’d honestly thought she’d forgotten about me. But it was pretty hard to forget her. Especially when she caused so much pain to Jeremy.

“But why are _you_ here?” She scowled.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m his best friend. And he’s _my_ best friend. Of course I’m going to be worried about him!”

She narrowed her eyes at me. “I just don’t see how the hospital staff could even think about letting you in though.”

Finally Mr. Heere stepped in.

“Beth, really, this is getting out of hand! I mean, Michael _saved_ Jeremy! I’d think he’s allowed to see him, right? I mean, I’d let him see Jeremy even if he hadn’t saved him, but let’s not freak out about this!” Mr. Heere’s eyes were bloodshot from crying, but his face was pale, and I knew that Jeremy’s face paled whenever he was really upset, so, assuming Jeremy had gotten that from his dad, Mr. Heere was not in a good state.

She finally looked upset. “Oh really Paul! You’re always against me! You see, _this_ is why I left you! But I begged you to let me take Jeremy, but you said no, that you were having him. Now look what you let him do! He landed himself on his deathbed, and it was probably because of this homo!”

There was a great big silence. Mr. Heere finally croaked out, “let’s go out side to discuss this, Beth.” And Mrs. Heere nodded curtly, her face flushed with anger. They stepped out of the room, and Mrs. Heere slammed the door behind her. I heard screams start to sound and took a deep breath.

I looked over to Jeremy and sighed. Instead of any emotions on his face, it was just blank. Like a blank canvas.

I walked over to him, and took his hand in mine, lacing my fingers through his. My other hand was stroking his face lovingly, trying to avoid the nasal cannula that helped him breathe. I saw another tube though, but I didn’t know what it did.

I softly ran my fingers over his burns. I wondered when Jeremy’s burns would heal, and I made a mental note to ask Mr. Heere. His bandages were slightly blood stained, but less soaked than last night.

I finally sat and thought about Mrs. Heere. Why was she even here? How did she even hear about it? God, I have to stop asking stuff in my mind that sounds exactly like their last name. But did Mrs. Heere habe some fucking telepathy and teleportation skills no one ever knew about or something?

I honestly didn’t know. I glanced back down and Jeremy and sighed.

There were two instances of his mom that stand out to me most.

 

_One day, five years ago, I was helping my Ma with the dishes and I heard the doorbell ring. My Ma continued to wash the dishes, while me and my Mom answered the door. I widened my eyes._

_There, standing on our porch, was a shivering Jeremy, his bright eyes bloodshot and full of emotions. His arms were crossed and there was a red mark on his face that oddly resembled a handprint. Tears were running down his cheeks. His teeth were chattering, and he was there without a jacket or anything. He was only wearing a plain black_ _t-shirt, with jeans and converse. And it had started to snow the other day, so Jeremy must’ve been out of his mind, or in really desperate need to get to our house._

 

_My Mom quickly ushered him in. She looked down to Jeremy, concerned. “Jeremy, what’s wrong?”_

 

_”I.... I d-don’t really w-wanna t-talk a-a-about it....” Jeremy stuttered out to my Mom. My Ma stopped washing the dishes, and came over to see what the big fuss was._

 

_My Ma gasped at seeing Jeremy in this state. She got down on one knee, and checked out the red handprint on his face. Luckily, at about this time, me and Jeremy were the same height, so when he started to lean on me for support, he didn’t have to bend down._

 

_My Ma finally spoke. “Oh, uh, Michael, take Jeremy upstairs. Jeremy, do you want me to call your mom, or your dad-“_

 

_“Dad! Please! D-don’t c-call m-my mom...”_

 

_Both my mom’s eyes showed recognition, and I saw my Mom’s jaw clench. My Ma smiled a forced smile, then my moms started talking to each other frantically. I decided it was time to get up to my room, so I climbed the stairs, with Jeremy leaning on me, and me supporting him._

 

_We finally made it to my room, and I sat on my bed, while Jeremy just kinda, stood there._

 

_He looked around the room, his eyes dull. He put a hand to the mark on his face that was slowly becoming a bruise and winced. He didn’t take hand away though._

 

_I didn’t have any idea what he was doing. I watched him as he went over to my window, staring through it. It was winter, and the window he was looking through, was aimed at the woods behind my house. The trees were covered with snow, and since it was about 5:40, the sun was setting, spreading an golden glow through the trees. The sky was beautiful, its normally periwinkle blue, the color of Jeremy’s eyes, was tinted with lavender, and the blue became a gold at the bottom._

 

_There were beautiful patterns of frost spreading on the window, and icicle spikes coming from the roof._

 

_I sighed. Jeremy seemed entranced with the fancy patterns of frost._

 

_I cleared my throat, intent on making Jeremy tell me what was wrong. Jeremy jumped, and slun around facing me._

 

_I stared at him, and he shyly came over to where I was._

 

_He sat down next to me on the bed, and I saw tears glistening in his eyes._

 

_I watched him as he tried to hide his tears, but was failing._

 

_“Do you wanna talk about it?” I asked, full of concern._

 

_”...N-no....” He croaked, still not looking at me, and still trying to disguise his tears._

 

_I nodded. I just sat there for a moment, until I wrapped my arms around Jeremy’s shaking frame._

 

_He didn’t even seem surprised. He just leaned into the embrace and started sobbing into my shoulder. Almost as if he couldn’t hold it back anymore, he wept out all his anxiety and fears of being a 6th grader now. And I didn’t even care._

 

_“I-I’m sorry...” he whispered into my hoodie._

 

_I shook my head and rubbed a circle into the small of his back, like my moms had done to me as a child. “Don’t be. You don’t have anything to be sorry about.”_

 

_I felt him nod into my shoulder. We stayed there for awhile._

 

_He slept over that night._

~

_Just a year ago, I was playing Super Smash Bros in my basement at 1 a.m. and I had just beaten a stage, when all of a sudden, I felt a buzzing in my pocket._

 

_I got my phone out of my pocket, and turned it on._

 

**Message from JeremyIsHeereAndQueer**

 

_I paused my game and tapped on the notification, sending me to messages._

 

_JeremyIsHeereAndQueer: im coming over_

 

_I furrowed my brow._

 

_MikeyGay: dude wtf its 1 am wat r u doin_

 

_JeremyIsHeereAndQueer: well talk when i get there ok_

 

_I sighed. I quickly typed a reply._

 

_MikeyGay: fine im in the basement so go thru the window_

 

_JeremyIsHeereAndQueer: ok_

 

_I sighed and shut my phone off, placing it on the floor next to my beanbag. I massaged my temples. WHY on earth was Jeremy texting me at fucking one in the morning._

 

_Not five minutes later, I heard the basement window open, and I turned towards the sound. Jeremy had just closed the window, and he was heading towards me, his head down, his caramel hair covering his face._

 

_I pat his beanbag that sat next to mine, and he silently sat down._

 

_The lights were off, so my only light source was the glow of the TV that was still on pause. So when Jeremy got in the light, I winced. He looked wrecked. Jeremy was only wearing a gray shirt with his boxers. Jeremy’s face was pale in a grayish way, and he was shaking. His eyes had bags under them, and were puffy and bloodshot from crying. His hair was messier than usual. But there was a big bruise on his cheek that went up to his temple. I wasn’t so surprised by the bruise, because thanks to Jeremy’s mother, Jeremy had had bruises, scratches, and lacerations on his arms and legs, but just because I wasn’t surprised, it didn’t mean I didn’t care._

 

_”Jeremy, what’s wrong?” My words dripping with concern._

 

_Jeremy didn’t respond._

 

_I figured he just didn’t feel like talking, which, wasn’t uncommon in the subject of his mom. ”What did your mom do this time?”_

 

_Now this sparked a reaction. Tears glistened in his sky blue eyes, and soon some rushed down his face. My arm somehow found itself around his frame, and he leaned into my touch. He wrapped his arms around my waist and buried his face in my hoodie._

 

_Finally, after about ten minutes of Jeremy sobbing, he stopped, and his sobs were reduced to a sniffle._

 

_“So... do you wanna talk about it?” I decided I’d give it a shot, even though every time I ask, he says no, which, again, wasn’t uncommon in his situation._

 

_But this time, he surprised me by nodding into my hoodie. I looked down at him in amazement, but he burrowed himself even farther in my hoodie._

 

_I sighed. “Well... what happened?”_

 

_Jeremy took a shaky deep breath, and stared down at his hands._

 

 _”Well,” both of us winced. Due to lack of use, Jeremy’s voice was scratchy and hoarse sounding. He cleared his throat. “Well... dad and mom got in a fight... y’know how it goes... it was a pretty stupid fight at first, something about being out of wine so she couldn’t get drunk out of her mind or some shit, but then mom started insulting dad’s personality, and I tried to break the fight up but... oh god it keeps repeating in my head... she punched me, and she called me worthless, stupid, a piece of shit, Michael. And it really hurts... but it hurts a lot since it’s the truth, and it was coming from the person who gave birth to me,” He paused, his voice shaking with emotion. “It just... hurts... it hurts_ so  _much Michael...”_

 

_I was shocked. “Jer, listen to me... you are so valuable, so smart, and the best person I know. Don’t ever let anyone say anything different.” He nodded, his lip quivering a bit. I nodded, signaling him to continue. He sighed and continued on._

 

 _“Then she just left. She just took her fucking things, and got in her car, and left. But the worst part is– I’m sad she’s gone. I know I probably shouldn’t, because, yay, now she won’t be up at 2 a.m., drunk off her ass, yelling at me and dad anymore, but I’m sad. I don’t even know_ why _. I dunno... maybe I just wanna go back to being five years old whenever she wouldn’t yell at me for holding her hand, and she would actually read to me at night, and kiss me all over, and say ‘I love you’, every night. I want to go back to when she’d come to the beach with me and dad, and swim and play with me in the water, and offer to make a sandcastle with me even if she’s done it a thousand times before. I wish I could just go back to when I got sick, she would take care of me, baby me, and she would cuddle with me all day, even though she would get sick too._

 

_“But... but I can’t... I don’t know how or why she started acting the way she is now, but now, she shows no trace of the loving, and caring, and overprotective mom she used to be... I dunno... I just... I’m acting silly I guess...”_

 

_He sighed and rubbed his eyes. I hugged him, longing to to kiss him, and find some way to get him out of his depression._

 

_”Hey,” I said softly, “do you want some tea maybe? Just to calm down?” He shrugged, so I took that as a yes. I said a quick ‘I’ll be back’, and head upstairs, to the kitchen. I got two mugs out of the cupboard, and turned on the cold water and poured the into the mug. The rest of me making tea was hazy, and I soon found myself lost in my thoughts._

 

_’How can Jer  be upset? His mom treated him like trash.’_

 

_The rest of my thoughts were along those same lines, until I finally noticed I had finished making the tea._

 

_‘God,’ I sighed, ‘why does Jeremy always go through the bad things?’_ _Jeremy stayed at my house for the the week._

_~_

 

I sighed, looking back to Jeremy. I wondered what was going through his mind right now, if he was scared, or... or maybe it was like that one Pokémon theory that all of Pokémon is in Ash’s coma... maybe Jeremy’s in an adventure like Ash... 

Suddenly, the door to the hallway opened, and a pale Mr. Heere came into the room. “I persuaded Beth to leave for now... sorry Michael, about her. She wasn’t always like that, wouldn’t’ve married her if she was.”

I smiled. “It’s fine Mr. Heere, I’m honestly, used to it by now.”

Mr. Heere smiled sadly.

He cleared his throat. A serious expression taking over his face. “Michael... we need to talk about the whole thing Jeremy’s going through, though...”

I stiffened. Did he know about the SQUIP? Or is he talking about Jeremy and how he even got in this mess here. I really didn’t know. “Uh... be more specific?”

He sighed. “Michael, I know you know what I’m talking about. I’m not blind, you know. I know that Jeremy hasn’t been acting the same.”

I looked away. He persisted. “Jeremy’s been acting... distant... for a while, and you haven’t been over in a month. Did something happen between the two of you?”

I shrugged. “Kinda...” I answered.

He didn’t seem like he quite got it, but he nodded. “I get if you don’t want to talk about it but... it would make an old man’s job easier...”

I sighed. Should I tell him about the SQUIP?... I should, but it’s not my story to tell... maybe I’ll just tell him about the SQUIP, but only what happened between us... and when Jeremy wakes up, he’d be able to tell us what happened to him personally.

I took a deep breath. “It’s from Japan... it’s a gray, oblong pill, quantum technology CPU... the quantum computer in the pill, will travel through blood until it implants in your brain, and tells you what to do. It’s called a SQUIP, and that’s what’s made Jeremy so distant...”


	7. A Visit And Drowning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Several weeks had passed since I’d told Mr. Heere about Jeremy’s SQUIP, and I was starting to worry if Jeremy would wake up. Word at school had spread, and a populor rumor was that Jeremy was currently on his deathbed, and was dead/dying. Many people had come up to me in the halls asking if it was true. But every time someone came up to me, I flipped them off and continued on my way through the day. It was hard enough when Jeremy had the SQUIP, but at least then I saw him everyday. I was still visiting Jeremy as much as I could, totally neglecting homework. And each time I came, not only did I become even more worried Jeremy wouldn’t wake up, I saw Mr. Heere becoming progressively worst, more and more anxious about his son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took SOOO long to get this chapter out and I don’t have an excuse for why; I was just lazy. And you’re spared from angst in this chapter. FOR NOW. It’s not permanent. I just felt like being nice because I listened to Sincerely, Me (the “kiNKY” puts me in a good mood lol) and the whole Be More Chill soundtrack the whole time while writing this. I’m watching Rick and Morty while I’m going over this so I might miss a few things. Just tell me in the comments if there’s anything I missed like typos or some shit.

Several weeks had passed since I’d told Mr. Heere about Jeremy’s SQUIP, and I was starting to worry if Jeremy would wake up. Word at school had spread, and a populor rumor was that Jeremy was currently on his deathbed, and was dead/dying. Many people had come up to me in the halls asking if it was true. But every time someone came up to me, I flipped them off and continued on my way through the day. It was hard enough when Jeremy had the SQUIP, but at least then I saw him everyday. I was still visiting Jeremy as much as I could, totally neglecting homework. And each time I came, not only did I become even more worried Jeremy wouldn’t wake up, I saw Mr. Heere becoming progressively worst, more and more anxious about his son.

On the third week, I was alone in the room with Jeremy because I had persuaded Mr. Heere to go down to the cafeteria and get something to eat for himself. I was doing my algebra homework, mainly because Jeremy had been a bit more unresponsive than usual.

 

_2x—4=(x+1)(2x—4)—5(x+1)_

There, one problem solved. Twenty more to go. I sighed.

I looked to Jeremy’s pale body laod on the bed, currently being fed through a tube, and shook my head. “Be glad you aren’t doing these equations right now buddy, because these are not fun at all.”

I took a deep breath and went back to doing my algebra.

Midway of me doing the fifth one, there was a knock on the door.

“Come in,” I said, thinking it was Mr. Heere. I looked up from my math to look at the door, and I saw the door open, but instead of Mr. Heere entering, an asian girl with a red dress and green leggings with a blue jean jacket entered the room. I gaped at the girl.

Christine Canigula.

She was holding a bouquet of daisies. She brushed her hair back behind her ear, looking cautiously at me gaping at her and to Jeremy’s unmoving body.

“Hi, Michael, right?” She asked. “Sorry if I’m wrong but, I just wanted to see Jeremy... I heard recently from Jenna Rolan that he was at this hospital, and I just wanted to stop by and check in on him.” She paused for breath. “Is he asleep right now? Should I come back later?”

That snapped me out of my state. “Well yeah he’s asleep, he’s in a goddamn coma!” I snapped at her. She looked taken aback. “Wait—really? I-I thought the rumors weren’t true!” Her eyes were wide.

I looked at her in disbelief. “Yeah really! Why would I joke about that, we’ve been best friends for twelve years!”

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I must sound so insensitive right now!” A bit of my frustration with Christine went away.

I sighed, running a hand through my hair, a habit I’d picked up from Jeremy after all these years. “Honestly, yeah. You kinda did. But it’s okay I guess. How about... how about we start over, yeah?” I said, looking up to her.

She smiled timidly, and nodded. “Hi Michael. I thought I’d stop by and see Jeremy for a while. I hope that’s okay with you?”

I grinned. She didn’t seem too bad. Not my type though. Obviously. My type’s Jeremy. And boys in general. “Nah, I don’t mind. It’s hella boring though after awhile. How about we just talk or something.”

She nodded, sitting down in the chair next to me. She saw my pride patch and smiled. “I like your pride patch.”

I halfheartedly smiled. “Thanks.”

She smiled, and just watched the rise and fall of Jeremy’s chest, the only part of his body moving.

“You’re right, this is kinda boring,” she said after five minutes of watching Jeremy breathing.

I laughed. “Yup. Just a bit.”

She smiled. She stayed for a little longer, us talking about a few things, until she looked at her watch. “Oh, I should probably get going.”

I nodded. “Yeah, wait what time is it?”

She glanced at her watch. “5:56 PM. I came here straight after I finished my homework.”

I didn’t even ask about play rehearsal, because I knew that since lack of ‘popular kids’, (Rich, Jeremy, and Jake) meant that not as many people would come and see the play, so until everyone was out of the hospital, and back to full health, the play would be back on.

We said goodbye, and I went back to my homework, the only thing to distract me being Jeremy’s repetitive breathing and the beeps projecting from the heart monitor.

I looked over to him. I read in a study that talking to someone in a coma might comfort them, and might help them make their way back to consciousness, and I’d done it every day since when I read the article.

I grabbed his hand, and squeezed it. “Hey Jeremy, It’s Michael. Christine just visited. She wanted to see you. Jeremy, people want—no, need you to wake up. You should see your dad. He’s... he’s a mess... Hell, you should see me! I’m fucking breaking down here!” I looked at him for a minute. I sighed, gripping his hand tighter.

“I just... I need you to wake up.” I smoothed back Jeremy’s hair, and I pressed a kiss to his forehead.

Right as I went back to my homework, Mr. Heere walked back in. We didn’t say anything to each other, our silence did that for us.

We were both getting worried by the minute.

...

Jeremy’s POV

It was after my breakdown, and I didn’t know how much time had passed. All I knew is that I felt numb, emotionless.

All was quiet for a minute, until I started to hear static.

“ _Jeremy_...”

“Ugh...”

“Jeremy....”

“Just shut up, you terrible walking floppy disk!”

“Jeremy....”

“Dude, what the hell do you want?” I sighed.

“You’re horrible. Terribly pathetic you know.”

I took a shaky deep breath. “I-I think I’ve already established t-that.”

The SQUIP acted like it couldn’t hear me. “You’re revolting. So unloved. I could’ve fixed that, y’know. But you threw me away.”

Tears started pooling in my eyes, and my vision got blurry. Jeez, who knew a glorified smartphone could make me cry. “I-I don’t n-need you. You... you were a-a mistake.”

The SQUIP chuckled. “Looks like we have that both in common.”

A tear leaked out of my eye, and I tugged on my hair.

The SQUIP only watched me in silence though. “You know, you could fix everything.”

I stopped pulling on my hair. I narrowed my eyes. “You mean you could fix that?”

The SQUIP rolled its eyes. “No Jeremy, _you_ can. Walk with me.”

I was suddenly forced from where I was, following the SQUIP to where he was leading me in confusion. Somehow, we ended up in my room, but I didn’t even remember getting there. We didn’t stop there though, we went to my bathroom.

We finally stopped, and I just arched my brow at the SQUIP. The SQUIP sighed.

“Go through your medicine cabinet, and y’know the anxiolytics you have? Eat them all at once.”

I looked to the SQUIP like it was crazy. “Are you _sure_ it will fix everything?”

The SQUIP furrowed it’s brow. “Well, yes I suppose, at least, in your eyes. You won’t have to go through pain anymore, and well you won’t cause pain, so, yes it will. Unless fixing everything isn’t your goal.”

I gulped. He was right. I wouldn’t hurt anyone, Jake, Rich, Chloe, Christine, Brooke, my Dad, and especially Michael. If I was honest, I’m probably doing it more for everyone but me.

I nodded. “Y-yes it’s my goal.”

The SQUIP nodded. I opened the cabinet door, and the anxiolytics bottle was the first thing I grabbed. I got a cup, (there was a cup right next to my toothbrush) a filled it with water. I opened the cap, and looked to the SQUIP. He was looking back at me, his arms crossed. I sighed, and plopped a pill into my mouth. I looked over to the SQUIP again, and it looked like it was urging me on. I sighed, and poured the whole bottle into my mouth. I got the water, and gulped a bit of it down.

It didn’t immediately take effect, but the SQUIP said to wait. Sure enough, I felt dizzy, and I collapsed, feeling numb. My vision went blurry, and the last thing I saw was the SQUIP standing over me, before I blacked out.

-

I wasn’t sure how I had ended up in the water. The shadow of night with the added blackness of the ocean depths made it impossible to see; impossible to breathe. I struggled against it, but the icy cold of the water made it impossible for me to work my limbs. I felt my body descend, my body numb, though my mind screamed for a savior while my lungs screamed for air.

In one futile attempt I opened my mouth to scream physically, but black, chilled water flooded into my mouth and choked me. The scream never came, and my heart sunk in despair as I sank in the black abyss of this ocean, I realised that there would have been no one around to hear it anyway. And so I drifted; in a liquid universe that seemed to hold no beginning or end. Tiny flecks of light floated around me, I noticed after some time; glimmering orbs of pure white light. They circled around me like microscopic angels, dancing about my head and fingertips in spiral loops that made me wonder if they were mocking me in my descent, or working in some futile attempt to save me. Not that it mattered, all though I was quite amazed that anything could live in this frigid cold.

I could feel the blood in my veins slowing to a halt as my heartbeat decelerated. The only way I could tell that my vision was blurring was because the lights in the water were dimming. I couldn't see my hands anymore, floating out before me and slightly over my head. My feet were lost in the murky waters below me, though I didn't make much of an effort to look for them. I knew I was dying. I felt my cardigan whipping around my limp body, and found that beneath them I was wearing my usual red and blue striped shirt, with my usual jeans and maroon converse with its sharpie graffiti on it. Confused, I looked up as though my answer lie there. I saw the full moon dancing beyond the shifting surface of the ocean and sighed inwardly. I wondered for a moment what everyone’s reaction would be to find that I had died; drown in some mysterious ocean when they had all thought I was simply having a breakdown. Or would I die from the medication overdose? Would they care? Would they be _happy_ about my death? One of the dancing lights wagged before my eyes in some frantic manner. It bounced from my left eye to my right, then back again. I tried to follow it, but my reflexes were far too slow.

I sighed inwardly one last time and began to let the lids of my eyes fall closed so that I might drift eternally in the black chill of the ocean. Then I came to a stop. Everything was calm. The rushing sound of water disappeared. I tried to open my eyes, but they seemed to be glued shut. I felt my heart hammering in my chest, until it again reduced speed. Death was against me in a game of tug-a-war, and right now, Death was winning. But instead of tugging on the robe, I would let the opposing team win.

-

 

I heard beeping when I first woke up. The beeping was what I was first aware of, until I felt pain on places on my arms and legs, and even my neck. I tried moving but my body refused to move. Great.

 

Suddenly, I heard a door open, and then close. Someone entered the room and-

 

“Hey Mr. Heere.”

 

_Michael?_

 

“Hey, Michael.”

 

_My dad?_

 

There was a silence, word wise, that is. I heard, who I assumed was Michael, sit down next to me, and took my hand, rubbing his thumb over my knuckles.

 

“So, was he active at all today?” Michael asked.

 

Somebody sighed, probably my dad. “No, sadly not...” My dad paused. “I... I don’t know what to do Michael... I feel like he’s not getting better at all, if anything, worse.”

 

Michael, I’m assuming, took a shaky breath. “Yeah... I’m worried too Mr. Heere.”

 

If I could move, I would’ve furrowed my brow. Who were they _talking_ about? And why did they seem so sad?

 

“So... has Mrs. Heere stopped by?”

 

I tensed at the mention of my mother. My action went unnoticed by everyone.

 

“Well, yeah, just yesterday after you left. She just said she wanted to check in on him.”

 

Okay, now this was just kinda getting annoying. _Who the Hell were they talking about?_

 

There was silence, the only thing filling it, was the annoying beeping that was to my left. The air was thick with disinfectant. I could also tell that I was wearing a dress of some sort.

 

Wait... annoying beeping, pain in certain places, disinfectant smells, and dresses? I mentally groaned. I must be in a hospital.

 

Now that just made me want to move even more. Now I got that my dad and Michael were talking about me!

 

“Hey Michael, I’m going to go use the restroom, okay? Look over him while I’m gone.”

 

There was no response, but I’m guessing Michael nodded, because I heard the door close, and Michael leaned into me.

 

“Hey Jer.” I would’ve smiled at the nickname. He called me that in third grade and I called him Micha. Now he used it when he was high, and when I was hurt or sad, or both. “Jer... I heard on Discovery that this works so... okay look, if you can hear me, and you understand what I’m saying, just... squeeze my hand.”

 

Hearing the desperation and love in Michael’s voice was almost too much to bare. I struggled to move; even though I’d come to terms that I was in the hospital, I didn’t know what exactly for, so I couldn’t understand why my body felt so heavy, so tired.

 

At the moment, I didn’t care if Michael actually hated me, or if my dad really did think I was terrible, I just wanted to know the truth so I could sort out my muddled mess of a mind.

 

I put all my strength and energy into at least moving a finger. Once I’d finally succeeded at that, I moved another ever so slightly. Feeling slowly returned to my fingers; my hands; my arms. I had already felt Michael’s hand in mine, but I only just now felt like I could interact with it. I gave his hand an experimental squeeze.

I heard a sharp intake of breath, then, "J-Jeremy?" The legs of Michael’s chair scraped noisily against the tiled floor as he jumped up. "Jeremy? Can you hear me? Try to squeeze my hand again."

Excitement flooded me, the hope in that well-known voice spurring me to redouble my efforts in spite of my lingering exhaustion. Focusing all my limited strength on that single action, I flexed my hand; it came out as a sporadic motion.

"Jeremy, that’s amazing!"

I had never heard Michael sound so excited. I felt the mattress move slightly as Michael perched on the edge. A hand moved through my hair; an oddly comforting gesture, albeit totally foreign. I involuntarily leaned into the touch.

Michael’s voice trembled slightly. "Can you open your eyes for me?"

Moving was a little easier now, but still required a lot more effort than was normal. Slowly, I lifted my leaden eyelids a minuscule amount, bright, blinding lights, being the first thing I saw. I turned my head over to the right and saw Michael, his face alight with a huge grin.

"You did it." Michael whispered. His hand was still in my hair. "How do you feel?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but the door opened suddenly, and I looked over and saw my dad. He was frozen for a second, until he walked over to my bedside, both me and Michael watching him cautiously, and took my hand. I gave it a gentle squeeze, and that was all it took. My dad burst into tears, and started hugging my frail body, but I winced at the sudden contact and hissed in pain. My dad instantly let go, and looked me in the eyes, all the concern evident.

“Are you okay?” He asked, repeating what Michael had basically asked earlier.

I opened my mouth to speak, but no sound came out. Huh. That’s weird.

A doctor suddenly came into the room, and saw me awake. He smiled.

“Ah, Mister Heere, glad to see you’re awake. Your heart monitor had shown your heart’s pace speeding up a bit, and I came here to see if there were any problems I should look into.”

I just looked to him, an expression of confusion on my face. He just chuckled. “I’m assuming you’re having difficulty talking, yes?”

I nodded. I saw my dad arch his brow. “And that’s normal?”

The doctor grinned and nodded. “Yes, that’s completely normal for someone who’s just woken up from a coma. Don’t worry, his voice will return very shortly, probably after a well rested nap.”

He looked thoughtful. “Although, I assume that right after you’ve just woken up from a coma, you aren’t very keen on going back to sleep.”

Michael just stared at the doctor. “Doesn’t he need some way to talk? Like a notepad or something? He doesn’t exactly know sign language.”

The doctor laughed. “Good point. There’s a notepad in the bedside drawer next to Jeremy’s bed. Well, I should go and check on other patients, but alert me if there are any problems.” And the doctor left.

That whole visit just made me more confused, and I think both Michael and my dad could tell. My dad went over to my bedside drawer, and got a notepad out. There was a pin attached to it, so that’s all I needed.

My dad handed the notepad to me, and I smiled at him gratefully, and started writing.

_First off, why was I in a coma?_

I showed it to my dad and Michael, and my dad looked to Michael. “Well son, that’s Michael’s tale to tell.”

Michael scratched the back of his head. “Well, do you remember Jake’s Halloween party?” He asked.

I bit my lip.

_I remember the party, not exactly what happened, except a few things_

I stopped writing instantly. The party. Oh god. Chloe trying to have sex with me. Brooke finding out. Jake breaking through a window. Barely escaping. Going to the bathroom. _Michael_. Calling Michael a loser. Leaving him in the bathroom. Seeing Christine. Asking Christine to go out with me. Getting rejected by Christine. Going back to the bathroom to apologize. Nobody was there. Fire started. Trapped. A beam broke and fell. Getting burned. Coughing. Fire. _Michael calling out to me_. Holy shit, I remembered.

“Jeremy? Earth to Jeremy?”

I jumped. Michael and my dad were looking at me in a worried expression. I gave them a sheepish grin, and wrote down what I remembered from that night.

Michael looked shocked. “Wait, so that’s what happened before you came to the bathroom? Dude, you basically got raped!”

I shrugged looking away. I suddenly let out a huge yawn, and Michael and my dad laughed. “I think you’re tired. You should probably get to sleep.” My dad said.

I nodded, smiling lopsidedly at the two.

I closed my eyes, and let sleep take over...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey I have two new stories up!
> 
> Ones called
> 
> I Lie and Say I’m Fine but I’m Really Not 
> 
> The other, more lighthearted one is
> 
> Matchmaker Christine to the Rescue
> 
> So go and check that out if you’re interested, and leave some support if you like them!


	8. Welcome Back to Your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Jeremy Heere, welcome back to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor. Your SQUIP.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well ive been in the hospital for the last few days and im currently on ibuprofen slowly dying in my bed (jk but it feels like it)
> 
> so you better fucking enjoy this
> 
> oh and if you want to listen along with Jeremy on the playlist Michael made for him, it’s called
> 
> Shit for my favorite furry :p
> 
> on spotify so yeah

Jeremy’s POV

I could not go to sleep for the life of me.

I sighed and tried to shift my sleeping position. You couldn’t exactly move and get in a comfortable position whenever everytime you move, you wince from searing pain. So I just fidgeted in my bed, staring up at the ceiling.

My dad had left the hospital recently, and Michael had left a little after my dad. Not without them both hugging me tightly, almost to make sure I was actually awake. And if I was honest with myself, I was pretty damn scared. Hospitals were scary at night, especially when you’re alone. The only noises in the room was my ventilator, and the heart monitor.

I groaned, after a minute. Okay, so I wouldn’t be going to sleep anytime soon I guess. 

I looked over to the nightstand near my bed. My phone was laid on the table. I looked at ot longingly, wondering if I’d dare to have the balls to try and lean over to get my phone and go through the pain off moving and irritating my burns.

I sighed. Why fucking not. I barely even just started to lean towards the bedside table, when my hip brushed up against the sheets, and I winced, and hissed in pain. “Shit! Shit, shit, shit, shit, fuck!” I let out a stream of curses, balling my hands into fists. I just bit the inside of my cheek for a second. I opened my eyes, and bit my lip, continuing to try and reach for my phone.

After much trial and error and _pain_ , I suddenly found my phone in my grasp. But I just stared at the blank screen in front of me. Now that I had my phone, what would I _do_ with it? I eventually came to a decision. I opened my phone up, and went into Spotify. 

I smiled fondly. A playlist Michael had made for me last year, (which I’m very proud of the playlist) was the most recent playlist I’d listened to.

I pressed shuffle, and somehow, I guess Spotify knew I needed to get the fuck to sleep, so it played Rain, a violin song. I nodded in approval. Yep, this’ll get me to sleep. In the 7th grade, I had a period where I had trouble speaking, and came to school with bags under my eyes, and hardly able to stay awake in class. So Michael, being the fallen angel he is to me, found the song Rain, and played for me after one of my bad nights, hoping I’d fall asleep from the music. Sure enough, before the song was even over, I had fallen asleep on Michael’s lap.

And sure enough this time too, I fell asleep before the song had ended...

 

-

 

“Ow!” I woke up with a start. “What the hell?”

“ _Target female inaccessible_.”

My eyes instantly widened. “Wait– no! No, no, no, no, no! I am not doing this agai— ow, fuck!”

“ _Re-calibration in process. Please excuse some mild discomfort_.”

“I swear I will fucking kill whoever calls this mild!” I growled.

“ _Re-calibration complete. Re-access procedure initiated_.”

I ran my fingers through my hair, tears pricking my eyes. “I-I swear to god, t-this is not f-fucking h-happening again.”

“ _Discomfort level may increase_.”

“Gah! Guah! Agh! Agghh!” I screeched in agony, clutching my aching head, (which thank god had healed from the incident).

“ _Re-accessing neural memory. Re-accessing muscle memory. Re-accessing procedure complete_.”

The SQUIP paused.

“ _Jeremy Heere, welcome back to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor. Your SQUIP_.”

I just cried softly into my hands, completely and utter forgetting the burning pain of my burns.

The SQUIP projected itself into the middle of my hospital room. I looked up, glaring at it. The SQUIP rolled its eyes. “ _Stop bitching about my re-activation, the doctors are coming to check on you, your heart monitor tracked your heart racing. Act normal. They’d only worry more if they saw you crying on your hospital bed_.”

I sent one last sharp glare towards the SQUIP before looking away. “I do whatever the fuck I want.” But yet I still rubbed my eyes, wincing as I worsened my burns. I leaned back into my pillows, closing my eyes and taking deep breaths.

And like the SQUIP had said would happen, the door to my room swung open, and the same doctor from earlier came in. The doctor saw me awake, and nodded, writing something down on his clipboard.

“Jeremy, are you okay? Your heartbeat went a bit off the charts.”

“ _Say you got a funny text from a friend-_ “ 

”I’m fine. Just had a nightmare.”

The doctor nodded knowingly. “Yeah, that seems to happen to recovered coma patients. Well just try to breathe in and out, and just go back to sleep.” The doctor turned around, and went out the door, closing it behind him.

I sighed, rubbing my temples and closing my eyes.

” _You know he’ll no doubt tell your father about this Jeremiah.”_

”Yeah, yeah, whatever Neo.”

The SQUIP made a strained noise. “I’m not the real Keanu Reeves, so there for I did not play in The Matrix.”

”Yeah, whatever, just go cry to Trinity or Morpheus about me bullying you.”

There was silence. I opened my eyes a bit, and saw that the SQUIP was no longer projecting itself. I closed my eyes. Just because he wasn’t there in physical form, didn’t mean that he wasn’t ever present in my mind.

” _Right you are_.”

”Fuck you, I’m going to sleep.”

The SQUIP didn’t reply, so I sighed intently, and happily went to sleep, now some how very capable of doing so.

 

-

 

I woke up to the sudden touch of someone stroking my hair softly. I felt a calloused hand in my hand, and I gently squeezed it. My eyes fluttered open, and saw my dad observing me, a fond expression on his face. I was honestly a bit surprised. He hadn’t shown this much affection ever since I was fourteen and was in the hospital because of pneumonia. My dad smiled when he saw my eyes open.

”Mornin’ Jeremy.”

”Hey dad.”

”How’d you sleep?” my dad asked curiously.

I rubbed my neck, wincing when my finger brushed up against my burn on my neck. “Eh.”

My dad nodded. “Yeah, the doctor told me you had a bit of a nightmare last night, woke up and your heart started racing.”

I nodded. My dad looked around the room. “Michael said he’d be here in a hour or so. He’s a good friend.”

I everted my eyes. “That I totally abandoned...” I whispered guiltily under my breath. I don’t think my dad heard.

“What time is it?” I asked. My dad checked his watch. 9:36 A.M. why do you ask?” I shrugged “Just wondering.”

My dad nodded. He turned back to me with a halfhearted grin. “So, you up for some breakfast? Now that you’re finally awake and able to eat?”

I nodded, my eyes widening in relief of him asking. My dad laughed a bit. “Okay, well I’ll go down and get some. If Michael comes in by any chance, just tell him I’ve gone to get you some breakfast, okay?” 

I flashed him a thumbs up, and my dad left the room, closing the door behind him. 

 

I grab my phone that was where it was previously last night before I went to sleep. I went into messages and scrolled down and tapped.

 

JeremyIsTheIntrovertHeere: dude.. the squip wasnt here before when i woke up from my coma but it reappeared last night

 

MikeyWay: fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this chapter was short. again i was in the hospital and thanksgiving and everything. i updated my fic
> 
> I Lie and Say I’m Fine but I’m Really Not
> 
> so yeah go check that out if youre interested i guess
> 
> tysm for reading and seriously i cannot thank everyone enough for leaving kudos & comments & bookmarks on my fanfics. it means a lot to me.


	9. Cuddles and A Visit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mygod, so Wednesday on my first day back to school since my top surgery, i had a sub named mrs. murphy. not so crazy, until i saw her name tag. 
> 
> Cynthia Murphy.
> 
> so i was flipping the fuck out. cynthia is kinda a common name, but matched up with the last name murphy, that’s not as common. so i tapped my boyfriend on the shoulder and i was like
> 
> “fuckin connor murphy’s mom is a sub here!”
> 
> my boyfriend just nodded and said, “yeah. don’t you know connor?”
> 
> so apparently there’s a kid named connor murphy that goes to my high school. i saw him in the hallway later after that period, and he actually looks a bit like connor from DEH.
> 
> ...well... that was my crazy monday!
> 
> oh, i also have a tumblr!
> 
> it’s the same username as my AO3 one, so if you’re interested, search it up and see my posts. sometimes i’ll put up sneakpeaks of new chapters on here, the rest just random stuff.

Michael’s POV

I honestly didn’t know what I was expecting.

When Jeremy woke up from his coma, I’d kinda just expected that to kinda just be it, over and done with. But no, Jeremy went through a tough experience, and like the human he is, he’s going to need some mental support. Besides, Jeremy went through something way more traumatic than just being called a loser. I hadn’t forgotten the odd bolts of what looked like electrocution scars on my friend’s pacman tattoo. I’d also noticed a scar much like the one on his tattoo on his neck, placed right under the burns Jeremy had acquired in Jake’s house.

But I just didn’t know what to do.

It was around midnight. I was in the hospital room with Jeremy. Mr. Heere asked me to stay with him, because he had to just go home, and take an actual rest. I agreed because it’s what friends are for. Mr. Heere mentioned that Jeremy’d need a little comfort before he went to sleep, but no problem.

But I didn’t expect this.

Right now, Jeremy was currently asking me if I could cuddle him to help him fall asleep.

I felt my face blushing. My palms started sweating. “O-oh, y-yeah. Sure, I’ll cuddle you...” I stuttered.

Jeremy snorted. “Stop stammering. That’s my thing.”

I rolled my eyes, but scooted my chair closer to Jeremy’s bed. I took his hand, which I don’t quite think he was expecting, and wrapped my arms around his torso. I started to use his stomach as a pillow. Jeremy just watched me, his eyebrow raised.

“Okay. Whatever, I guess that works,” Jeremy mumbled. I sighed into Jeremy’s stomach. Jeremy giggled. “S-stop!”

I grinned evilly, and did it again. Jeremy let out a laugh. “Dude, that tickles!” I stuck out my tongue. “Exactly what it’s supposed to do, Miah.”

Jeremy smiled. “I remember when you first started calling me that.”

I smiled fondly, a wave of nostalgia washing over me too. I sigh suddenly, and Jeremy looks to me, confused. I look to him, a bit of seriousness in my expression. “But Jer... we need to talk about... us.”

Jeremy winced as soon as the words left my mouth. I bit my lip, cautiously waiting for his response. Eventually he met my eyes and nodded, somewhat hesitantly.

I inhaled deeply, and I looked away, breaking the eye contact. “Jeremy... I just wanna let you know... I-“

But Jeremy cut me off. “Look, Michael, I know you’re going to forgive me like the absolute saint you are to me, but... I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I fucked up. I know that I’m terrible, fuck, you even told me-“

”Woah there,” I cut him off. “Okay, first of all, yeah, I do forgive you, but I’m not a saint. Second, you do deserve my forgiveness. And third, you are a wonderful human. Emphasis on human. Humans make mistakes. And fourth of all, you are talented, useful, clever, funny, brilliant, and beautiful. And I have no idea where you heard me say that you’re terrible, because that is far from the truth. Plus, I’d be lying if I said that.” I looked into his troubled eyes, but he was stubbornly avoiding mine.

After a minute of silence, I sighed. “Jeremy, meet my eyes.”

Jeremy took a deep breath. He hesitantly raised his head to look me in the eyes, but as soon as he did, a tear ran down his face.

I raised my hand to wipe the tear from his face, but he jerked his head back, and I brought my hand back to holding his hand. 

“Jeremy-“ I started.

”No, Michael...” Jeremy cut me off. “C-can this just w-wait ‘till morning?” His eyes were looking into mine, his eyes desperate, and full to the brim of tears. “I-I’m... tired.”

I stared at him searchingly. “We will talk about this in the morning, right?”

Jeremy nodded and gave a slight grin. “Right.”

So I closed my eyes, and listened as Jeremy’s breath slowly evened out. I could feel his cast on his ankle underneath my arm. I opened my eyes just a bit to see if Jeremy was asleep yet, and sure enough, his eyes were shut. I smiled. He was cute when he slept.

I turned my head to face the slightly open drapes. The window was open, so I felt the soft breeze on my face. The dark of the night was calming. I slowly sat up in my seat, careful not to wake Jeremy up, and stood up. I went over to the lights, and flipped the light switch so that the light turned off. I turned back around to head back to my position in Jeremy’s lap, and saw Jeremy stir in his sleep.

I froze for a second, not wanting to wake my best friend up. I chuckled lightly as Jeremy mumbled in his sleep, and, from what I could catch from his jumble of words, ‘leave me and Unicorn alone Mr. Toothpaste!’

I shook my head smiling. It wasn’t rare for Jeremy to talk in his sleep, so I gladly stayed up most of the night listening to my friend mumble things from his sleep.

I sat back down in my seat beside Jeremy’s bed, and laid my head back in my position. I sighed contently, and closed my eyes, placing my hand in his, gently rubbing over Jeremy’s knuckles.

”’Night, Miah...”

 

...

 

I woke up to knocking on the door. I sat up, and saw that Jeremy was stirring in his sleep. I sighed and let go of his hand, and reached over to the bedside table for my glasses, which I had luckily placed on the table last night at some point. I put on my glasses, and just decided to leave my hoodie off where I had left it last night. I stood up and stretched, letting out a shuddering yawn.

I walked over to the door, rubbing at my eyes. I placed a hand on the doorknob and pushed down on it, opening the door.

I honestly didn’t know what I was expecting.

But I didn’t expect this.

Right now, Brooke Lohst, Chloe Valentine, and Jake Dillinger were standing at the door, (well, correction. Brooke and Chloe were standing. Jake was in a wheelchair.)

Chloe scoffed. “We wanted to see Jeremy, not you.”

I just stood there in silent fury.

”Michael, who’s at the door?” a groggy voice from behind me asked.

I turned around, and saw Jeremy’s weak attempt to sit up, and went over to his bedside to help him. He smiled graciously, and I nodded. “Thanks.” His still groggy voice croaked. 

“No problem.”

”Jeremy?”

Jeremy looked over to the doorway. “Oh.” he said plainly. “Hey guys.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and yes i know i am absolute trash that cannot be trusted for spending so much time on this chapter and not even come out with a decent amount of dialogue or really anything but (this is an excuse btw) i just had top surgery, aanndd i just recovered from the flu. so idk this chapter still isn’t one of my favorites but if this chapter is ever going to get posted, i have to post it nooow before i forget


	10. Home Is Where The Heart Is, Oh, and A Crazy Homophobic Mother Pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you all had a great [insert whatever you celebrate] because i did! And i have some art! my great cousin said "yo jeremy. you should draw some art for your fanfic" and i was like "you're right, i should!" so there's gonna be some art for last chapter and this chapter on my tumblr and maybe the next idk, and gahh! sorry i haven't posted in literally, forever?? this chapter was just a dosey to write, but luckily, the next few chapters should be easier to write, hence it comes out sooner.

Michael’s POV

 

I always followed these five rules.

 

  1. Try to avoid popular kid’s eye contact.
  2. Try to avoid being in the same room as a popular kid.
  3. Try to avoid speaking with a popular kid.
  4. If ever engaged in contact with popular kid, make up an excuse to leave IMMEDIATELY!
  5. If friend (Jeremy) is ever in hot water (getting beaten up) by a popular kid, help friend (Jeremy) out of said situation ASAP.



And currently, I was breaking four of my sacred five rules. But I would not, and I repeat, would not, abandon my fifth rule. Jeremy was in too vulnerable of a state right now, and I just couldn’t do that to him.

 

So even before Jeremy started to send me some panicked glances from his bed as the two girls cooed over him, I had started to rack my brain of ways I could help my friend out. But while I thought I had just come up with a good idea to get everyone out and away from this hospital room, Jake called me over, "Hey, uh... Mike, right?"

 

"Michael, but close enough," I corrected, stonefaced.

 

"Oh, sorry man!" And I was shocked when he said that because Jake genuinely looked sorry. 

 

"Uh, nah, it's okay dude."

 

Jake shrugged. We sat in an awkward silence for a second. "So, you rescued Jeremy, right?" Jake asked.

 

I mimicked Jake from earlier and shrugged too, "I mean, yeah. We fight but he's my best friend. There's nothing I wouldn't do for him."

 

Jake smiled, "That's cool, dude. I saved Rich too, jumped out of a window doing it."

 

I gaped at the guy in a wheelchair before me. I remembered seeing a guy jump out of a window to get out. I just didn't know it was also a rescue. "Wait, that was you? You jumped out of the window?"

 

Jake laughed nervously, rubbing his neck, "Well, yeah, same story for Rich. I'd kill a guy for him."

 

"Woah, dude. That's a little too far. You should at least ask for help burying the body," I joked. Me and Jake laughed for a second.

 

"Y'know, you're actually not too bad Mike-er, Michael. I don't know why everyone's always giving you a hard time man."

 

"Yeah, well, I guess it's what you get for being the high school gay-stoner-nerd-guy," I said nonchalantly.

 

Jake winced, "Sorry, about that by the way, though."

 

I shrugged, "Nah, it's fine. Popularity isn't everything," I said, "Besides, I'll be cool in college."

 

Jake laughed his booming laugh, and I guessed that finally drawed the attention of the two she-devils. "Jake!" Chloe gasped in a horrified manner. "What the hell are you doing talking to that—to that homo?" ~~~~

"Chloe, I don't-" Brooke tried to say, but Chloe interrupted the blonde. "No, Brooke, let me finish my sentences!" 

 

That shut Brooke up. "And Mike, how about you leave us alone. We're Jeremy's friends, and we want to see him! And we all know you're just doing what you're doing because you have a gay crush on him!"

 

I stared at the brunette, my mouth wide open. I felt heat rush to my face. "Chloe, that's a little too far-" 

 

"No Jake! What I said is perfectly justified! He's just a little creep, desperate to get in Jeremy's-"

 

"Shut up!"

 

Everyone looked over to Jeremy.

 

He was sat up in his bed, shaking, and incredibly pale, his eyes glaring at all of us.

 

"Just- everybody, shut the hell up!"

 

Everyone stared at Jeremy. 

 

"Let's not cause a scene, okay? Please?" Jeremy sighed. "For me?"

 

Chloe and Brooke instantly went back to their places at Jeremy's bedside, abd I saw how uncomfortable Jeremy looked. I think Jake did too. "Uh, I think you guys should leave..." I said, but no one seemed to hear.

 

Jake noticed no one listening. "Hey, Chlo, Brooke, we should probably leave, huh? We don't wanna get Jeremy too worn out."

 

Chloe and Brooke looked over to Jake, and Chloe sighed. "Why are you right? I swear those broken legs of yours are giving you wisdom."

 

But what Jake said seemingly did the trick, because the girls got all their things together, of coarse, not before 'soothing' Jeremy one more time. Jake wheeled his chair over to Jeremy. "Take care lil' dude," and Jake ruffled Jeremy's hair. "Bye, Jake," Jeremy waved.

 

I watched Jake roll his chair out the door, closing it behind him, and snorted when the door closed. "'Lil' dude'?" I laughed.

 

"What?" Jeremy asked defensive, smiling. "I'm one of the smallest in the group, well, besides Rich, but we aren't exactly allowed to make fun of his size. Unless, of course, we want him to drop kick us."

 

I smiled. "What about Brooke and Chloe? They're about your height."

 

Jeremy looked at me like I was crazy. "Are you kidding? Do you really not know that much about girls?"

 

I shrugged. "Well it's not like you know much more than I do."

 

"Well I know enough to know this. They would go batshit crazy if we ever called them short. Like, without those heels of theirs, they'd be screwed."

 

I laughed. "Well that makes me glad I'm gay as fuck!"

 

Jeremy and I laughed for a minute, until Jeremy started coughing, I went over to his bedside and sat down, laid a hand on his back, waiting for the episode to subside.

 

I noticed, while Jeremy had finally gotten his coughing under control, that Jeremy was still wearing his nasal cannula. Once Jeremy'd finally stopped coughing, I asked him a question. "So, you're still needing that nasal cannula?"

 

Jeremy shrugged. "Apparently. My dad asked the doctor about it, one time when you wear at school, and the doctor said that the smoke had kinda screwed up my lungs, and they said that I'd have this on as long as they think I should need it."

 

"But can you breathe on your own?" I asked. "Like, without the cannula."

 

Jeremy bit his lip. He made the fifty-fifty motion. "Kinda? I mean, it hurts, and it's more like I'm wheezing rather than breathing."

 

I nodded. "Gotcha."

 

"So, what's been going on at school?" Jeremy asked.

 

I grinned. "God, you sound like my moms."

 

Jeremy raised his hands defensively. "Hey, I'm just an innocent house fire victim, as much as I love your moms, don't compare me to them."

 

I laughed, slapping Jeremy lightly on the arm. Suddenly my ringtone of Goofy singing Wake Me Up Inside, (which me and Jeremy had a whole argument, Jeremy saying it was more of an alarm than a ringtone, and me wanting it as my ringtone. In the end, I did it as my ringtone because, it's my phone, right?), blasted throughout the room. Jeremy jumped, and I answered it laughing at Jeremy. Jeremy stuck his tongue out and giggled.

 

"Hello?" I said into the phone.

 

"Hey Michael," Mr. Heere's voice came through the line. 

 

"Oh, hey Mr. Heere."

 

"Hey, look Michael. I just got a call from the hospital saying that Jeremy's well enough to come home. I'm coming to pick him up, but Beth wanted to see him so just, get Jeremy ready for it, okay? Don't want him freaking out or anything when he sees her walking through the doorway."

 

I gulped. "Uh, sure thing, Mr. Heere."

 

"Great. Thanks Michael."

 

And Mr. Heere hung up.

 

And as soon as I looked over to Jeremy, I knew instantly that he'd been listening. He started fidgeting with his hands, and color rose up into his cheeks. He bit his lip nervously, staring at me. "M-my mom's h-here?"

 

I sucked in a breath. "Uh, yeah Jer. Yeah she's visited a few times when you were in the coma..."

 

Jeremy brought his hand to the back of his neck, grabbing a lock of his messy brown hair and tugging on it.

 

"W-well, let's get t-this over with..."

 

 

-

Jeremy's POV

 

Before my mom and dad came up to the room with a few nurses at their sides, Michael tried to keep me calm by holding my hand and talking about a video game he'd found out about online. I was hardly listening though. The words coming out of Michael's mouth seemed to bounce off of an invisible force field around me. I felt my palms sweating, and wiped them on the sheets of my hospital bed. I felt barely aware of my surroundings. 

 

I glanced over to the SQUIP, who was silently observing Michael talking to me from the corner. The SQUIP had been very quiet today, but I couldn't say that I cared much. Soon after I'd woken up from my coma, I'd found that I didn't trust the SQUIP as much as I had before Jake's party.

 

I went back to staring at the door in front of me. I think Michael knew I wasn't listening. He was probably only continuing to ramble on about this video game, "Undertale", apparently, because he knew it helped my anxiety to have something droning in the background, much like how it helped him to have some music playing in the background.

 

Suddenly, the door opend. In walked a few nurses with a wheelchair, my dad, and lastly, my mom. I felt the grip Michael had on my hand tighten. I was surprised. My mom looked exactly like the last time I'd seen her. Her hair was streaked with, admittedly, more gray than it had been, and her face definitely had more wrinkles. 

 

"Jeremiah! Oh, my baby! I'm so glad you're awake!" My mom cooed, pushing Michael out of her way, cutting off mine and Michael's connection, and held me in a bone crushing hug that made the burns on my arms flair with pain at the sudden contact.

 

I let out a pained hiss, but my mom didn't let go. Instead, she just ignored it, favoring stroking my hair over than checking on her own son to see if he was okay.

 

"Ma'am let him go, he's in pain!" I heard a nurse reprimand, and my mom glared over her shoulder. "Quiet! He's my son, I think I'd know if he was in pain!" She turned back to me, her glare softening. "Oh sweet baby boy... I'm so sorry this happened. I knew I shouldn't have let him have you in your father's care. He's a bad parent."

 

I scratched my hands, looking away from my mom's stare. "He's better than you've ever been." I muttered darkly under my breath.

 

"Jeremiah William Heere! Is that any way to treat your mother who drove all this way to see you?" My mom scolded.

 

I bit my lip. I started visibly fidgeting, and both my dad and Michael saw. "Beth, how about you just wait in the car. I doubt you'll want to help Jeremy into a wheelchair."

 

My mom huffed. "I guess you're right, Paul." And she turned back to me. "I'll see you soon baby." She kissed my forehead and walked out of the room.

 

I glanced to the SQUIP. He had a raised eyebrow. " _Well you're mother's quite... the character_." The SQUIP observed. 

 

_Tell me about it. She's just..._

 

" _A lot_?" The SQUIP supplied. 

 

_Yeah. A lot._

 

" _Say yes_." The SQUIP demanded.

 

"Yes." I voiced out of habit.

 

I widened my eyes. 

 

 _Dude, what the fuck_!

 

" _Just watch_."

 

Suddenly, I felt the sheets uncover my body, and felt hands underneath my body. "One, two, three!" And I was lifted from the bed by the two nurses, my dad, and Michael, and into the wheelchair.

 

_Okay, I was not expecting that._

 

The SQUIP just smirked.

 

" _You should learn to trust me. I only have your best interests at heart, y'know_."

 

I had been bickering with the SQUIP so much, I hadn't even known that my chair was moving until it stopped. I jumped. We were in front of an elevator. I looked behind me to see who was pushing my chair, and my dad was. I gave him a nervous smile and he gave me a questioning look. "Uh, dad, can you please _not_ tip me over? Like, I don't wanna fall out of this thing."

 

My dad only rolled his eyes and smiled. "I'll try, kiddo."

 

I looked to my side and Michael was there. He seemed to have been observing me. He widened his eyes and looked away when I caught him staring at me. I laughed. "Michael what were you doing?"

 

"U-uh, nothing!" Michael buried his face in his hands. I snorted. "Nothing my ass."

 

My dad lightly slapped me up the head. "Language!" I turned back to my dad, rubbing the spot where my dad whacked, and stuck my tongue out at him playfully. Michael was stifling his laughter from our exchange.

 

"Dude?" I said, turning to Michael now. "Don't you know it's rude to laugh at a poor innocent guy in a wheelchair?"

 

"Yeah." Michael dead panned.

 

"Okay, then why are you laughing at me?"

 

"Okay, well, you're neither poor or innocent..."

 

"I swear Michael, once I'm home, I'm going to beat your ass in a round of Mario Kart!"

 

"Language!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Instagram: jeremy_is_utter_trash_hi
> 
> Tumblr: jeremyistheintrovertheere


	11. No Homo, Full Homo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys... get ready for fluff i stg

Jeremy's POV

 

Getting into the car was extremely hard and uncomfortable. I'd accidentally knocked my leg into the door, my cast colliding with the metal door, earning a high pitched yelp from me, and squeezed Michael’s hand practically to death, as he was helping me into the car.

 

”Jesus, Jer, could you squeeze a little harder?” Michael teased. I huffed, and buckled myself into my seat. I was glad my mom was sitting shotgun, other than sitting in the back with Michael and me.

 

But my thankfulness was short lived, because apparently being in the front didn’t stop her from fawning over me.

 

Not only did I not like being loved on so much, I also found it unnerving that the woman that used to abuse my dad and I, was now treating me as if I was the world’s greatest treasure, like how she used to.

 

So once everybody was strapped into their seats, my dad started driving. At first, it was silent, with Michael fiddling around with his headphone cord, and me biting the inside of my cheek, staring outside the window at our current surroundings.

 

I felt a tap on my hand, and turned towards Michael. He motioned me towards him, and I obliged, leaning into his head. He cupped his hand around my ear, and started whispering. 

 

“Are you okay?” Michael whispered, his eyes glancing towards my mom who was watching us in the mirror.

 

”...Yeah.”

 

Michael rolled his eyes, “You hesitated.”

 

”Well what the hell do you want me to say?”

 

“Tell the truth.”

 

My eyes darted to my mom’s blue eyes much like mine watching us.

 

I sighed. “What do you think the truth is.”

 

”That you’re not as okay as you’re saying you are right now.”

 

I gasped dramatically. “Wow Sherlock! How ever did you find _that_ out?”

 

Michael grinned. “My super best friend bro senses.”

 

I laughed. We weren’t even whispering anymore. “Dude, where did you come up with that, because I need a t-shirt for that.”

 

Michael shrugged. “It’s in the Super Best Friend Bro Book Guide.”

 

Y’know how when you laugh so hard you don’t make a noise. Yeah, that was me. At this point, I was laughing so hard I was crying.

 

”Dude, are you trying to make me die from suffocation or something? Crap!”

 

Now my dad was watching me and Michael’s interaction with interest.

 

”Nah dude, I’d never do that. Besides, you wouldn’t suffocate! You still have your cannula!”

 

I scrunched my eyebrows. “Oh yeah... I forgot those were there.”

 

“ _Haha, yes, very comical of you Jeremy,” SQUIP said._

 

Michael laughed, smacking me lightly on my arm, accidentally slapping a raw burn. I winced, clutching the area of the irritated burn tightly.

 

Michael’s laughter faltered, and he inhaled, holding his breath.

 

”Shit, dude, sorry, fuck, did I hurt you?”

 

I looked away, shaking my head softly. Michael pulled my hand away from the burn, and observed it, making sure he hadn’t hurt me too bad.

 

”Michael I’m fine, don’t worry about it. It didn’t hurt that bad, just kinda stung for a second.”

 

Michael didn’t respond. I sighed, yawning a bit as I did so. “I’m tired. I’m gonna fall asleep, ‘kay Michael?”

 

Michael hummed his reply, and I nodded, getting in a comfortable position in my seat. Before I knew it, I’d dozed off in my seat.

 

-

 

I remember waking up and going back to sleep a few times, twice waking up and still sitting in the car, the next few of the times waking up in a dark room.

 

But the next thing I remembered was opening my eyes and seeing a wooden ceiling, and hearing the sputtering and crackling of a fire near my ear.

 

No.

 

No, no, no, no, _no_.

 

This was not happening...

 

Michael... he came to get me. I'm safe. He rescued me. I'm safe. I was in the hospital. I'm safe. I'm safe, I'm safe, I'm safe, I'm _**safe**_.

 

I began to hyperventilate, coughing as I did so. I felt burns started to form on my body, the blistering sensation eye watering, and me want to scream. I felt blood oozing out of my head, matting my hair with blood, and staining my costume of what the SQUIP wanted me to dress up as-

 

The SQUIP.

 

"R-reactivate..." I croaked out, my throat feeling like fire.

 

But my efforts were futile. "Reactivate," I tried more firmly.

 

I felt my Adam's apple bob, and felt a sob stick in my throat.

 

"..Jeremy...."

 

"SQUIP?" I asked, my heart souring with hope it could get me out of this situation.

 

"-Jeremy."

 

"SQUIP! Can you-"

 

"Jeremy!"

 

...

 

Michael's POV 

 

We had been back at the Heere household, Jeremy's mom insisting she stay the night. I was in Jeremy's room, his wheelchair shoved in the corner, and sitting on an old wooden stool that had been hidden in the corner of Jeremy's room, that I'd pushed over to Jeremy's bed where Jeremy now laid, his brow slightly pinched, with his tray oxygen tank sitting next to his bed, pumping air into the nasal cannula worn on Jeremy.

 

I was hunched on Jeremy's stool, scrolling through tumblr, and looking at everyone's newest posts when Jeremy started whimpering.

 

I looked over to him, and turned my phone off, scooting my chair closer to Jeremy's bed.

 

"Jeremy?"

 

Jeremy mumbled something incoherent.

 

"Jeremy."

 

Suddenly, Jeremy started to breath faster, and started to struggle in his bed.

 

I shook Jeremy lightly by his arms. "Jeremy!"

 

Jeremy's eyelids shot open, his eyelashes dark on his ashen face, and his eyes glassy and unfocused, and unnaturally feverish eyed bright, and panicked.

 

"M-Mi-Micah-" He choked out, cutting himself off with a strangled sob.

 

"Shh, shh shh shh, shh... Miah, it's okay, it's okay Miah, I'm right here..." I cooed, raking my hands through Jeremy's hair.

 

"M-Michael..." Jeremy whimpered.

 

"That's right, Miah, I'm right here, and I'm staying, okay?"

 

Jeremy nodded wordlessly and I hughed him, and he cried into my shoulder.

 

We both were silent for awhile, a quiet understanding passing between us that I wasn't going to push Jeremy for details until he was comfortable with telling me.

 

"Mikey..." Jeremy mumbled.

 

"Yeah Jer?"

 

He didn't say anything, but I didn't expect him to. "I'm here Jeremy. I'm here."

 

Then suddenly, without really knowing what I was doing, I kicked my shoes off, and climbed into bed with Jeremy, wrapping my arms around, and allowing Jeremy to tuck his head on my shoulder. His curly, fluffy hair tickled my ear, and I heard him sniffle a few times.

 

He was quiet for so long that I'd thought he'd fallen asleep when he finally got his head out from where it was. His eyes, puffy and bloodshot, looked into mine.

 

"I love you Michael..."

 

My heart leapt. For once, maybe I wouldn't be the stereotypical gay, forever pining on the straight guy, and his feelings were the same as mine. Maybe, just maybe, my feelings would be returned-

 

"No homo, though!"

 

My heart fell flat on its face. I would forever be the stereotypical gay.

 

"Yeah... love you too... Jeremy."

 

Jeremy smiled, his eyes that I loved so much, shining.

 

I sighed hesitantly, and gave him a smile. God dammit, why did Jeremy have to be so cute, and fragile, like a little egg!

 

Jeremy laughed, and I tilted my head to the side. "What's so funny?"

 

"Dude, you just called me an egg, why wouldn't I laugh at that?"

 

Dammit, I voiced that.

 

I rolled my eyes. We talked a little, both exchanging our gratefulness for it being Thursday, One day before school let out for Thanksgiving break.

 

Jeremy fell asleep after a while of watching Rick And Morty. When I was finally ready to pass out, I turned off the Tv, and looked at Jeremy, who was currently using my chest for a pillow. 

 

"'Night, little egg."

 

I paused, deciding whether I should take the risk and say what I sooo badly wanted to admit, or just stay silent, because he might not be fully asleep.

 

"I love you, Miah."

 

-

 

I woke up the next morning from a toilet flushing downstairs. I groaned, turning around so I could try and face the opposite direction and fall back asleep, when a huge commotion came from downstairs. I jumped, right as two people started yelling. Jeremy, who had somehow gotten out of bed without waking me up, and without help, was sat on his wheelchair on his computer, the oxygen tank laying right next to his desk. Jeremy had flinched when his parents (presumably) started fighting, and held his headphones tighter over his ears to block out the noise.

 

I got out of bed, grabbing my glasses off the nightstand, and walked over to Jeremy. I squinted at his computer screen. He was watching a buzzfeed unsolved video, that I wasn't exactly sure that I'd seen yet.

 

"What'cha doing, Jer?"

 

Jeremy jumped, and spun around in his chair to face me, looking like I'd just caught him watching porn.

 

"Woah, relax dude. S'not like I caught you watching porn."

 

Jeremy tensed at my mentioning of porn. "I'm watching buzzfeed unsolved," Jeremy said, still a bit frazzled from being surprised by Michael. 

 

"Cool, which one?" Michael said, sitting down at Jeremy's desk chair.

 

Jeremy squinted at the title of the video, mumbling about how he should put his contacts back in.

 

"Uh, The Creepy Murder In Room 1046," Jeremy said, leaning back in his wheelchair, taking his ear phones off, and placing them on his desk, unhooking the cord connected to his computer. "Wanna watch?"

 

I shrugged. "What time is it?"

 

Jeremy sighed, and checked the time on his desktop clock. "Five 'o four AM.

 

I nodded. "Sure, I'll just wear this today."

 

Jeremy shrugged, and nonverbally skipped back to the beginning of the episode. It was a twenty minute one, so it kept us from going downstairs Jeremy's mom and dad fight. Unfortunately, they were still fighting by the time we got down, quieter, but still fighting.

 

I was helping Jeremy downstairs, holding the air tank in one hand, the other holding Jeremy and making sure he didn't fall down the stairs, Jeremy gripping onto my hoodie and the stair rail like it was life or death for him. I eventually just picked him up halfway down the stairs, (a satisfactory shriek from Jeremy), and carried him the rest of the way downstairs, and sat him on the couch in the living room, placing the air tank by his feet, and I went back upstairs to get his wheelchair. I brought it downstairs, and picked him up again, (again, a satisfactory squeak), and plopped him in the wheelchair.

 

"You're sleeping downstairs tonight," Michael panted, pushing Jeremy's chair, "because that was a shit ton of work for me. You're lucky you're my best friend, 'cause I wouldn't do this for anyone else."

 

"Of course you're helping me, and no one else, it'd be weird if you were doing this for a stranger."

 

I snorted. "Good point."

 

When we entered the kitchen, Mr. Heere and Jeremy's mom fighting faltered.

 

"Oh, Jeremiah! Breakfast is sat on the table," Jeremy's mom informed Jeremy, shoving me to the side to push Jeremy to the table.

 

Mrs. Heere, looked over to me, her false snake like face scowling, like she forgot I was still here. "There's some granola bars in the cabinet over there."

 

I already knew that, but I knew they were always the crappy protein bars that tasted like spoiled oatmeal. 

 

"Uh, M-Mom, Michael a-and I should p-probably head up s-stairs to get ready...?" Jeremy stammered.

 

"Oh nonsense! You've got plenty of time before school!" Mrs. Heere chirped.

 

"A-actually, n-not really-"

 

"Jeremiah, don't talk back to me," Mrs. Heere's bright tone soon became more strict.

 

Jeremy's Adam apple bobbed. "Yes m-ma'am."

 

"Beth, lay off Jeremy, look at him, he's miserable."

 

"Excuse me Paul, I think I'd be able to tell if he was!" Mrs. Heere said, slowly standing up, and walking over to Mr. Heere.

 

I instantly knew from childhood sleepovers, if me and Jeremy didn't get out _right now_ , we'd be in the middle of a war zone.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Instagram: jeremy_is_utter_trash_hi
> 
> Tumblr: jeremyistheintrovertheere


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